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MIL problems..........

A week ago or so I guess i made my mother in law mad (( I stood up to her)) I told her that how we want to raise our son is our choice. So i dont feel that i need to apologize. I didnt yell at her, I didnt snap, I sat her down and told her. But then she started acting strange around us and i asked my hubby about it, he said to act like it didnt make her mad... but then today they stopped by and wouldnt even come in... HOW AM I SUPPOSE to ACT LIKE NOTHING BOTHERED HER WHEN THEY ARE?? I think if I try to talk to her again it will only make her more angry. Do i leave it alone?? She needs to be a part of my sons life, and my husbands...


Asked by BabyBugsmama at 11:44 AM on Oct. 18, 2008 in Relationships

Level 24 (19,995 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • I went through a similar situation only it was m husband that stood up to my MIL but Igot the flack because according to her and the restof the family that was unlike my hubby. Only it took six months for them to talk to either one of us. And to tell u the truth things are never going to be the same. i think u did nothing wrong. If anything u did it the right thing. now she knows where her boundaries lay. i only WISH that i had been the one to confront my MIL because now she plays the deceitful one and when i say anything to my hubby , he just plays her to be the victim and me look like the bad guy. And needless to say she still never learned her lesson. Sometimes Mil's never realize that they were once in the same positions and need to remember how they felt and step back before they stick their foots in their mouths. She is a grown woman she'll get over it.

    Answer by lovemybeba at 12:34 PM on Oct. 18, 2008

  • What you did was just fine. Shes an adult and has to accept it and get over it!

    Answer by Steph319 at 11:46 AM on Oct. 18, 2008

  • She'll come around when she gets over it. She just wants to be number 1 lady and it is hard for women to see there sons having another woman in there lives. Of course they always think you are doing it wrong. I am 7 years in and mine still thinks I suck. But doesn't stop her from coming to stay with us every single weekend. She'll come around don't worry.

    Answer by lovinmomto3 at 11:47 AM on Oct. 18, 2008

  • She will get over it. Just continue to be nice and plesant. In time it will pass. After ten years I have figured out how to deal with my MIL, but there have been rocky times.
    We get mad at each other and after a few days we get over it. You can remind her that as her DIL you want to be her friend, not just an in-law. (When she cools off that is) Good luck!

    Answer by evilabbysmom at 11:50 AM on Oct. 18, 2008

  • give her time to work thru what you said and come to terms with it. sometimes it is better to let sleeping dogs lie than it is to stir things up again. she will either accept it and respect your assertiveness or she won't. either way she will have to live with her decision and how it affects everyone she loves and those her love her back.

    Answer by ChickenShark at 11:53 AM on Oct. 18, 2008

  • personally she does need to bud out.... my bf family is always telling him what to do how to do it when to do it with OUR babies and he tells me all of this and since there is a language barrier i cant tell his family off the way i want to, so i tell it to him. but believe me.... if there was no language barrier.... i would have done the same thing u did.

    Answer by melissa089 at 12:44 PM on Oct. 18, 2008

  • Just leave it alone, she is acting like a 3 year old and you are not and don't need to stoop to her level. She has to get over it on her own. There's nothing you can do or say to help her at this point.

    Answer by feesharose at 1:08 PM on Oct. 18, 2008

  • ah i did the same thing to MY mom, they get butt hurt easily. It's been......a month or so and I have yet to talk to my mom, she did send my son one package but was rude about how she sent it and addressed it. I just let her act like a child she is the one that will look ignorant. If she wants to act like a child then I'd rather her NOT be a part of my son's life. It was hell for me growing up around her and I have chosen to make my sons life easier and she doesn't agree with things I do because I don't take the easy way out! Whatever she'll get over it, or she won't, no lost sleep here

    Answer by bigtrucksgirl at 1:19 PM on Oct. 18, 2008

  • oh i wanted to add all a child needs are LOVING parents

    Answer by bigtrucksgirl at 1:20 PM on Oct. 18, 2008

  • let it go. she'll be the one missing out and she'll realize that one day.

    Answer by melody77 at 2:40 PM on Oct. 18, 2008