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4 Bumps

Is it ok to talk to your ex boyfriends?

My husband if offended that I recently found my ex (4 years ago we were together for 7 months) on Facebook and asked how he was doing. He and I broke up because he was jealous of my friendship with my now husband. They fought a few times on the phone and threatened each other but it seemed like no big deal to me!

I said hi. He told me his dad just died, I told him we just got married. My husband read the whole conversation and saw that it was all nothing! Yet he thinks me even talking to him on facebook will lead to me wanting to get back with him! He insists that I cant talk to my ex because I will cheat sooner or later. My in-laws caught wind and all agree with him that it is inappropriate because of the tension between them 4 years ago!

What do you think?

Answer Question
 
amber710

Asked by amber710 at 8:23 PM on Sep. 17, 2010 in Relationships

Level 18 (4,826 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • I personally say leave it alone...No reason to "be friends". Especially if your husband and he had some words with eachother...

    Good Luck!
    tiger_tatted1

    Answer by tiger_tatted1 at 8:28 PM on Sep. 17, 2010

  • I think my dh would be upset too. To him having contact with an ex is like waving candy in front of a baby. I think if it means friction in your marriage its just not worth keeping up the friendship. They also dont get along which doesnt help either
    babybutastink

    Answer by babybutastink at 8:29 PM on Sep. 17, 2010

  • Then how do I go about telling him not to talk to me when I first contacted him?
    amber710

    Comment by amber710 (original poster) at 8:38 PM on Sep. 17, 2010

  • flip the situation now what do ya think???????
    sunflower39346

    Answer by sunflower39346 at 8:38 PM on Sep. 17, 2010

  • I have a couple of ex's that are my best friends... however, they have always remained my friends, regardless of my relationship status. It's not my SO's decision who I associate with.
    ObbyDobbie

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 8:45 PM on Sep. 17, 2010

  • I think that it is inappropriate. Especially since it bothers your hubby so much. You really should put your hubby's feelings before your ex boyfriends, shouldn't you? Think about it.
    Just tell him, the ex, that you are happy he is doing good, and that it you can't talk anymore. Tell him it's bothering your husband, and you are going to respect him, and end the communication.
    It doesn't matter if you don't have romantic feelings for the ex. Not one bit. This communication between the two of you is really bothering your hubby. And you really should respect that. If you can't, then just why are you married?
    Raine2001

    Answer by Raine2001 at 9:08 PM on Sep. 17, 2010

  • leave the ex alone. you are heading for trouble
    canta1980

    Answer by canta1980 at 9:11 PM on Sep. 17, 2010

  • well if they never got along, they wont get along now. i have the same situation. my hubby hates all my exes. but 7 yrs ago i was with a guy for a year, and he dont want me to talk to him, he disnt even know we had dated and was aquantances w him. but when he found out he wouldnt talk to him... depending on if they got along or not and how u feel bouth them now..
    jlouise03

    Answer by jlouise03 at 9:12 PM on Sep. 17, 2010

  • They don't get along, then why would you want to put your husband through that?
    Would you like it if you had friction with your husband and he's writing her on the internet?
    And how far would this friendship go? Facebook, then emails, then texts, then phone calls?
    Just let him know that unfortunately your husband doesn't feel comfortable and hope you have a good life bye.
    Honestly, I don't understand why you'd go out of your way to find this ex. Unless you have unresolved feelings for them.
    Mrs.Halloween

    Answer by Mrs.Halloween at 9:19 PM on Sep. 17, 2010

  • Well your in-laws are right . If it's over it's over . Ask your self is it okay for him to talk to his ex girl friend . I would take him off my friend list You can't possible value your marriage enough !!!
    Blue1212

    Answer by Blue1212 at 9:38 PM on Sep. 17, 2010

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