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What must be done for my fiance to adopt my daughter?

Me and My fiance have been together ever since i was 15weeks pregnant with my NOW 2 yr old daughter Mariah, her Sperm donor knows NOTHING about her, he went to prison when i was 5weeks pregnant,anyways, how can my Fiance adopt her? do me and him have to be married so she can have his last name? BTW she has My last name, and the sperm donor is NOT on the birth Cert. So how do i go about this?! How do i do this? Im totally lost??!? Help!!!

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Asked by Anonymous at 5:36 PM on Oct. 18, 2008 in Adoption

Answers (10)
  • talk to a lawyer.

    Answer by pugpin at 5:51 PM on Oct. 18, 2008

  • I think the first step is, that he has to accept paternity. Then he wouldnt even need to adopt her, if im not mistaken.

    If he accepts paternity then he has the same rights for the baby like you have. Means, when you guys break up then he has the right to get custody for her as well as you do (unless you make a "contract" -talk to a lawyer about it- where you will have sole custody no matter what)...

    But all the paternity and adopting laws are very complicated. and pugpin is right, you should talk to a lawyer about it. if there is no lawyer on here who can answer your question then you should check the internet for a law forum. i know that there are many of those :)


    Answer by m.robertson811 at 6:09 PM on Oct. 18, 2008

  • check online under your states laws.. each is different so i can't really tell you what for sure is the law because it may be different where you live. good luck tho.. sometimes i wish my daughters dad wouldn't have been on the certificate so my now husband could adopt her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:15 PM on Oct. 18, 2008

  • thank you!! do u think it will be alot of money or anything?! Even thou he isnt the REAL father, they would let him sign the birth cert. as if he was the real dad?

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:41 PM on Oct. 18, 2008

  • If you don't mention that he isn't the real dad they probably would let him, though I'm not sure. However, if you don't do it through the full legal route, you could be putting your child's well-being at risk down the road. What if the real bio-dad finds out about her, or his family does? They could then cause legal issues down the road in trying to get rights to be involved in her life. I have heard of cases like this where years down the road the "dad" showed and won the right to shared custody. It would be best, IMO, to have biodad be determined the father. You can then (most likely) get his rights terminated because he is in jail. Then, your fiance is free to adopt her legally, with no complications in the future. Talk to a lawyer before you do anything. He will be able to tell you exactly how to best proceed.

    Answer by romeece at 8:45 PM on Oct. 18, 2008

  • if there is no father you could go to court and tell the judge that he is willing to accept this child as his own theres really nothing to it my friend did it and because the donner was not arround to accept responsibility it was not a problem look in the front of your phone book and call for free advice in your area on one of those lawer pages where you could ask for advice but i think it will be fine

    Answer by rjsjjs at 8:48 AM on Oct. 19, 2008

  • ok wonderful!!!! thank you all sooo much!! yeah i def dont want her REAL father in her life!!!! hes no good and will jus cause drama and i dont need that, neither does my family!!! Thanks Again!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:05 AM on Oct. 19, 2008

  • Hey I'm going through the same thing right now but it's my husband who is adopting my daughter. We have been together since I was 4 months pregant and he's been "Dad' for 4 years. All we had to do is go to a law library, print out adoption papers and petition the courts. It's probably going to be about $150 all together. But it is different in every state. I found most my answers from the local social services office. You might not even have to get a lawyer involved, we're not using one. All it means is we have to do our own paper work but its saving us $600. Good luck! I know it can be overwhelming.

    Answer by katyameliasmom at 9:29 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • Does real dad know he's her father? Snd just because they are in prison not a good enough reason to terminate rights I know a girl who's kids dad is in prison and he still had vistiation rights his mom would bring his kids to see him every other weekend and she had no say in it

    Answer by abellvalerie at 5:03 PM on Oct. 25, 2008

  • My dd bio dad had rights terminated. First, in ALL states you have to be married. Then bio dad must not have contact for some time. Look up your state and guidelines for TPR.

    Answer by p6cakes at 10:40 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

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