Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

sex for the first time after having baby.... adult content

so im thinking i need lots of lube and we need to go REALLY SLOW...i had quite a repair done...3rd degree tear plus episiotomy...its been 9 weeks...any other advice? oh, and also, what kind of lube should i use if i have a picky vagina? no perfumes or dyes etc...

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:16 PM on Sep. 18, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • As much as you may want to have sex, you NEED to wait, especially with the degree of tearing you have. It's so hard to abstain while you're still healing, but you have to wait until you're healed.
    _Tam_

    Answer by _Tam_ at 1:10 AM on Sep. 19, 2010

  • I never had sex that soon after baby. If the pain wasn't gone from the ordeal, I simply didn't have sex... Lube or not if it hurts to wipe it's going to hurt to have sex... As for lubes, good luck, I have yet to find a good one - I've tried DOZENS and none of them have proven to be any good...
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 11:20 PM on Sep. 18, 2010

  • I think I would wait.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:17 PM on Sep. 18, 2010

  • I only had a 1st degree tear and stitches, and I couldn't have sex until my son was 3 months old. I agree with the first poster and I'd probably wait a little longer if I was you.
    Ash9724

    Answer by Ash9724 at 11:20 PM on Sep. 18, 2010

  • Astroglide is better for it than KY. I waited 3 and a half months after my first (I had a very difficult delivery) and it still hurt like hell. We didn't try it again for another month and a half. Really, it wasn't comfortable for probably the first year of my son's life. I had a much easier delivery with my second (who was a much smaller baby, too) and was expecting pain, but was fine having sex at six weeks postpartum. Good luck.
    JulieJacobKyle

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 11:28 PM on Sep. 18, 2010

  • yes start off slow u dont wanna hurt ur tear n k y has some unsented lube
    sandi_361

    Answer by sandi_361 at 11:19 PM on Sep. 18, 2010

  • maybe he could use his fingers first to soften you up and maybe a vibe so that he can have better control and you can see if you'll be able to handle his. i have no idea about lube. been looking for a good one myself.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 11:20 PM on Sep. 18, 2010

  • Water based KY and yes, GO SLOW!!

    Personnally, I like it rough, but this is not the time for that. Gentle slow love making is what you need. You will subconsciencely tense up because you will expect it to hurt and that will only make it worse. Try to relax, have a glass of wine or 2, or beer if you are not a wine drinker.

    Also, TALK to your husband and make sure he understands the situation and tell him "If you hurt me, it will be a LONG time before we try again"
    Maureen-MD

    Answer by Maureen-MD at 11:20 PM on Sep. 18, 2010

  • Be careful...we tried 6 weeks after I was torn really bad and had to stop I couldn't take it. my daughter is 20 months old now and there are times that I still have to stop b/c that area that was stiched up hurts...good luck.
    sweet_mamaof3

    Answer by sweet_mamaof3 at 11:26 PM on Sep. 18, 2010

  • I hurt too bad to have sex so soon. I had 12 stitches from where I tore.
    Mom2Just1

    Answer by Mom2Just1 at 11:31 PM on Sep. 18, 2010

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN