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How would you handle this? Its really starting to piss me off.

My husband and I have my mentally 12 year old sister as a roommate. My husband and I have a 2 year old son together. My sister thinks she is his Mom. We won't let her babysit because she is not responsible enough. But the tone in her voice when she talks to him,(its like all motherly) the way she will decide things for him without even asking me (when he should have a bath and promising him he can go to the park later) and the way if I let her push his stroller she will push him really fast so she is way ahead of me and my husband is really starting to make me mad. Its like her mind moves into that "mommy mode" and she really believes he is her son.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:33 AM on Sep. 19, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • You said she is mentally 12. If this is truely due to her being mentally challenged, then you have your answer. This is how a 12 year old might behave. If you are her caregiver, you will need to be very strict with her about how she can treat your child. Let her know that if she can not follow these rules, she will not be able to do things with him, such as push the stroller.
    This is also a good lesson for your son. Being raised with someone who is mentally challenged will teach him compassion and acceptance of people who are disabled.
    While I understand how it can be irritating, please be patient and understanding with her, yet be firm in the rules. She can't help how she is, but you need to put the safety of your child first.
    layh41407

    Answer by layh41407 at 11:38 AM on Sep. 19, 2010

  • I think that is sweet, my cousin has cerebral palsy and he is 17, but mentally he is 2. It just require a lot of patience to handle, but she is mentally 12, so she should be old enough to understand how you feel, try talking to her. Honestly though, if you are her care giver, it's just going to require lots of patience and love. IMHO you sound resentful, like you don't want the responsibility of her while you have your son. Try finding another, more patient family member for her to live with. I think that your child would be much more compassionate (among many other wonderful attributes) from having her in your household. I hope I didn't offend you, as that was not my intention. Good luck.
    gottalovemal

    Answer by gottalovemal at 11:42 AM on Sep. 19, 2010

  • I'm confused...why are you mad at your husband?
    PerfectLove910

    Answer by PerfectLove910 at 11:37 AM on Sep. 19, 2010

  • She's not mad at her husband. She's mad at her sister.

    If it truly bothers you, then you need to either find somewhere else for your sister to live OR get some counseling for your sister to help her realize that she is just a roommate in this situation, not the mother of the child.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 11:39 AM on Sep. 19, 2010

  • I am not her caregiver. She was living in an apartment alone before she came here. We live together to save money on rent.
    luvsmysonjames

    Answer by luvsmysonjames at 11:46 AM on Sep. 19, 2010

  • i am confused........if she is mentaly only 12 why was she living alone? and it sounds like you resent her living with you...if thats the case i would be making other living arrangements for everyone involved.....and maybe just talking to her calmly and explain how you feel about her behavior toward your son will do the trick and having her relize she not his mom? good luck with it all
    cara124

    Answer by cara124 at 12:16 PM on Sep. 19, 2010

  • I see that as touching but that is me. I think that you should talk to her about how you are feeling she may not even notice that she is doing it and if she does well still tell her that you are bothered by it.
    agriffinmom4

    Answer by agriffinmom4 at 11:37 AM on Sep. 19, 2010

  • I'm not mad at my husband.
    luvsmysonjames

    Answer by luvsmysonjames at 11:38 AM on Sep. 19, 2010

  • Sorry ladies I read it wrong...
    PerfectLove910

    Answer by PerfectLove910 at 11:44 AM on Sep. 19, 2010

  • it can b aggervateing but as long as she poses no risk id just try talking to her bout it
    Kittty_Katt

    Answer by Kittty_Katt at 12:05 PM on Sep. 19, 2010

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