Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

I feel so trapped. I want to leave but can't. I am tired!

I feel like leaving home but am afraid it will later affect me. I love him and I think he does too but I keep getting angry and into a fight with him about his irresponsible spending. I have repeatedly talked to him about our finances and his actions and he doesn't see anything wrong. He can lend money to friends or treat them to lunch while I'm penny pinching to get us food for the week, and he knows this. I feel like I want to take my dd away with me for a few days and see if he would miss us and maybe think things through but I'm afraid it will backfire and we will end up separating instead. He is very revengeful and will do nothing to help our marriage just to get back at me. What do I do? I love him but I hate him right now for making me feel so miserable. What to do?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:42 PM on Sep. 19, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • Finances are one of the top things that lead to divorce. If he really does love you he will agree to counseling or sitting down to make some sort of compromise or budget. Good luck.

    Answer by KTMOM at 5:45 PM on Sep. 19, 2010

  • HOnestly every marriage has issue with money. You guys need to sit down and talk about it. Also give out an allowance if he is making the income he probably feels that he should be able to spend it since he earned it. Just talk to him about it and see if he is open for changing.

    I knew someone in the same situation who got mad with her husband spending but was worse with money then him and would buy things to make him made when they fought. Just talk about it

    Answer by Claudiomom at 5:48 PM on Sep. 19, 2010

  • Sometimes you can only talk about the same things so many times before there is no point anymore. Money is one of them. If he can buy lunch for his friends, something I find odd after people are married anyway because adults buy their own food, without a care that his actual family does not have enough food, that does not exactly scream adult behavior. Neither does his vengeful behavior. As for leaving for a few days to give him time to figure out what should be important, if that makes him split with you, it does not seem like much is there you know? A seperation is supposed to put it all in perspective and make him realize he misses you and that he needs to compromise. Life is too short to be miserable.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:02 PM on Sep. 19, 2010

  • Just try and talk to him

    Answer by LiLJeni at 4:12 AM on Sep. 20, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.