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3 Bumps

how to approach the subject

OK so my dh and i will be married for 5 years in January and we have been having a pretty rough couple of years....fighting a lot...the only thing we can agree on is that we love each other and want to make our marriage work. I have been thinking that it would be a nice idea if we were to do a vow renewal ceremony...nothing big...not another wedding just me him and our dd. so first..do you think it is a stupid idea and second how should i approach the subject with dh?

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momofone072506

Asked by momofone072506 at 1:33 AM on Sep. 20, 2010 in Relationships

Level 16 (1,796 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • you should write him a letter or ask him over a txt or email...or even propose to him like he did with you...something crazy and out of character and creative...i thinks its great idea best of luck mama

    iNk-FrEaK

    Answer by iNk-FrEaK at 1:36 AM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • Is the rough part financial? If so how much do you think the ceremonywill cost? It's good to renew vows but maybe you should wait until you both overcome the issues you're going through first. No I do not think it's a stupid idea. It sounds wonderful. I just think it will be more meaningful if you both resolve the fighting issue first.

    SylviaNCali

    Answer by SylviaNCali at 1:37 AM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • I think it sounds like a wonderful idea. I do suggest that maybe you guys take some counseling classes or get Fireproof the movie and do The Love Dare. I think the ceremony would mean so much more when things between you were resolved. Good Luck.
    hsmominky

    Answer by hsmominky at 1:43 AM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • I like the idea... Could you just mention it casually to him?? I also like the love dare idea, the movie is awesome by the way. Maybe watch it together and then bring up the vow renewal??

    mom2maddie06

    Answer by mom2maddie06 at 4:06 AM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • I love the idea of a vow renewal. My husband and I are going to renew our vows in another 4 years (when we have been married for 10). It can cost pretty much nothing. For renewals you don't have to have a judge, or preacher, or any paperwork or anything. Anyone can "officiate" a vow renewal ceremony. And as for bringing it up, I love iNk_FrEaK's idea about you proposing to him.
    QueenMomma2023

    Answer by QueenMomma2023 at 9:34 AM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • I like the idea, maybe with some of your own written vows to help strengthen the feeling that you are moving forward. i love teh idea of a letter, writing things like that gives you a chance to really think through your words and present your idea in a manner that isn't going to get lost in translation or find you stumbling for words on the spur of the moment. Also it gives him time to digest the information and really sort through his feelings about it instead of possible blurting his initial reaction and being hurtful. I think given a day or two to think it over there is no reason why he wouldn't agree. Just keep it personal.
    GoldenLinds

    Answer by GoldenLinds at 9:48 AM on Sep. 20, 2010

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