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Question for christians.. from a christian

I grew up with my mom pretending to be one person (really polite, and perfect) while at church, and then at home she was a totally different person, (On drugs, an alcoholic, and I saw he get abused by boyfriends A LOT) I struggle now, I WANT to believe more than anything with all my heart, but I just cant. Im always questioning God, whether he is actually real. Or it's just some pretend, make believe thing. I know that sounds awful, but just the way she was growing up, and we never talked about Jesus unless some of her christian friends were over, then she turned into the 'good mom' again. Im not sure what I can do to get over this. There's a great big wall inbetween me & believing in God. I go to church, and really try my hardest to believe but the more I try the harder it is to comprehend he does exist. I don't know what else I can do to help myself truly believe.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:38 PM on Sep. 20, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Answers (29)
  • Maybe if you have to struggle to get there, it isn't the right path for you.
    witchqueen

    Answer by witchqueen at 12:42 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • I think its normal for you to feel this way because of the way your mother acted. You now view christianity is a diffrent light. I know you do believe or you wouldnt be even interested in trying to believe. You need to pray, maybe go a christian womens confrence or group and share with them.
    okmommy08

    Answer by okmommy08 at 12:46 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • Why do you feel the need to believe?  You obviously don't believe so you need to figure out what is holding you back and let it go.

    beeky

    Answer by beeky at 12:47 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • just because a person chooses to follow a man that was perfect-it does not make them so.
    becoming a christian does not transform one into being perfect. in your judgement you have found fault with your mother, does that make you a better person or the same person or a worse person than your mother? what all do you blame your mother for? and what do you want to start owning and being responsible for? stop looking to the past and make some decisions for yourself based on what you believe to be true regardless of what you have seen or heard others do.
    jewjewbee

    Answer by jewjewbee at 12:57 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • She asked this to Christians... I believe the people that responded are not.

    I am a christian and I will tell you what is happening.
    This is what I see ok?
    Your mom is/ was hurting and it is apparent to me that she never grabbed a hold of who she is/was in Christ Jesus. She also most likely did not feel that she was loved. Her behavior indicates this. However this was not any of God's fault. Your mom made these choices on her own and allowed the open door of the enemy to be in her life. This of course left you with a bad impression of who God is and what Christianity was to be about. How do we fix this? Well first with the guidance of Holy Spirit. the Love of the Father and His Son. What I encourage you to do is to forgive your mom. This act of forgiveness will free you from this. You also need to ask God to forgive you for judging her for this behavior and most importantly speak blessings over your mom's life. Cont.
    Shaneagle777

    Answer by Shaneagle777 at 12:59 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • She asked this to Christians... I believe the people that responded are not.
    ------
    It is only for God to determine who is a christian and who is not. you do not possess that capability.
    jewjewbee

    Answer by jewjewbee at 1:02 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • I responded and I am CHRISTIAN.
    okmommy08

    Answer by okmommy08 at 1:04 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • I encourage you to ask God to forgive you for judging Him. He did not make your mother this way. It matter of fact it hurts Him more than anything to see her in the pain she was in, the suffering but until your mom was ready to be free He could not intervene. Once you do these things you WILL find freedom. Whom the Son sets free is free indeed. Where the Spirit of the Lord is there is freedom!
    Now ... I want you to know this. God loves you! He is not mad at you! In matter of fact He is in a GOOD MOOD! Why? Because He KNOWS the end results of His transformed into His Glory Children! His Grace is sufficient for you! He is for you and not against you! You are His beloved child and a treasured princess in His Kingdom! He loves you so deeply and so outrageously! There is nothing He won't do for you! Everything in the Kingdom is YOURS.. Yes it is the Father's GOOD pleasure to give YOU the Kingdom!
    Continued....
    Shaneagle777

    Answer by Shaneagle777 at 1:05 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • First sit quickly like you are meditating and listen.
    Go out and find God, he is in the good works you do and others do. Volunteer at a shelter, you will see him there and such places a lot, talk to the people there. They will teach you about him.

    God isn't only in a building or his words only in a book, he is all of us, if we chose to hear him. Seek him out he does not hide.
    Good luck to you and I hope you find what you seek.
    DevilInPigtails

    Answer by DevilInPigtails at 1:08 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • jewjewbee : You havent been around long enough have you? I have for 4 yrs .. I know who has confessed and who has anounced on here who is not a christian and I was speaking of the first four ... :-) so gentle step back please thanks :-) Btw you had not posted yet when I saw the post and I was typing when you were posting :-) make sense now .... good :) now to finish what I was saying to the OP....
    Lastly Father, I ask that you would bless this precious beautiful child of yours, that you would scoop her up in your loving Father arms and pour out your healing upon her heart and breathe your life and love over her in the sweet gentle way you do for your loved ones! Guide her and lead her in your perfect will and perfect way! She is YOURS... all YOURS... thank you Lord in Jesus name I pray AMEN! :-)
    I truly hope this helps you.
    Shaneagle777

    Answer by Shaneagle777 at 1:11 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

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