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How do i get my daughter to do her homework?

She is 6 years old and ever since she was in Kindergarten she refuses to do her work at home. Her Learning Teacher told me all kids hate doing homework at home with their parents but to be firm with them. I have tried and it doesnt work. First i say lets do homework then you can go play. She says okay but then she starts to fidget, cry, even sweat! Lol.. She tells me "I dont know how, i cant do it, i dont know" she is lying because if she didnt know how she would not be in 1st grade. her teacher and learning teacher told me she does know but is acting like this because i am not her teacher. She cries and cries. she just sits there telling me i dont know. I loose my temper and i just leave. i give up, i dont know what to do! i was told to give her stickers but if she initially doesnt do her work then why the stickers? as soon as she sits down she starts to cry. She told me TAP is PIG! she does this crap on purpose. Plz help!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:53 PM on Sep. 20, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (10)
  • Set a time and place for homework. Like right after school. Set a timer of 30 minutes and tell her to sit and do homework until the timer goes off, then, she can have a break and go play. Let her play for an hour and then if she isn't done with homework, have her come back for another 30 minutes. Only this time if she isn't done, she can't go play for an hour, she only get 15 minutes. The timer will make her see that she isn't there forever and the break will have her not as frustrated. After doing this for awhile, she should come in and get it done quickly with no issues. Don't make it a struggle and don't stand over her. Just set the timer and walk out of the room for the whole 30 minutes.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 1:58 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • You can tell her that you know she is smarter than that- and that you've talked to her teachers about how well she is doing in school. Next make up a behavior chart. Everytime she complains, cries, refuses to do her work, she gets a mark against her. (& vice-versa for ea. time she stays on task) Or you could start moving her bedtime back in 15 min. intervals for ea. time she acts that way. Tell her it's b/c she needs more rest to be able to do her work. Stay firm & consistent w/ her. As long as you know for sure she is capable, I wouldnt let her play you for a fool. Stay strong mom- it's only gonna get worse if you dont!

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 2:00 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • Op here- Sorry i forgot to mention she is only 6 years old and i cant leave the area. Some of the stuff i have to help her because in 1st grade there doing Flash Cards and Reading already. She has to pronounce the words like Family, Sister, Green etc. She cant read yet so i need to help her. It would be nice not to sit there but if i leave she wont do it. Im pretty sure at school she gets help

    Answer by aeroslove at 2:01 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • So, it is all work that requires your help? Wow, my son had worksheets and thing to do on his own. Ok then. Do what I said, minus the leaving. Tell her it is homework time and she has until the timer goes off. Maybe the timer will kickstart her. Add time to it everytime she whines. That will be a visual reminder for her to keep working. that takes the stress off you and takes her whining off you and focuses it onto the timer.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 2:05 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • It is a new school year and alot of kids r unsure because they don't have the same teacher as last year. Take away things like t.v. time or put her to bed early and try in the morning after she eats. U need to try to sit there and say "If u need help I am right here sitting with u. Try not to get distracted,don't leave the room.

    Answer by dancer at 2:08 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • where are you doing homework? Some kids do better in a school-similar invironment. Have you tried setting up a desk in a room with no distractions like tv, radio, and other people besides you and her? Can you try having your SO do it? My son does better with his dad when it comes to writing and with me when it comes to other activities. I don't know why but it works sometimes to have a different adult then normal, always there, mommy. If it comes down to where she will do it for anyone but you, what about a tutor? Some middle/ high schools have progras where honor students earn service learning hours through tutoring.

    Answer by wildwiccan83 at 2:11 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • Well I find that my kids need some time to decompress and burn off some energy after school. They can and will focus a lot better on homework if they get that chance than if I ask them to do it right after school. So when they come home they get a snack, pick up their rooms, then have an hour of free time before homework. It's not optional. If they whine and fuss, they get a penalty. You need to get into a routine and stick to your guns. Since she has been sucessful at getting out of doing it by acting up for a long time, it is going to be a battle and take a while to get her into a better habit. But it is good that you are starting now and not waiting until she's older and homework has gotten a lot harder.

    Answer by riotgrrl at 2:12 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • I am going though the same thing with my 13 yrs old SS and I know how you feel. But he knows that nothing can be done until his homework is completed. No computer, viedo games, phone, TV. He has gotten a lot better in the past week but we don't let it go and if there is assignment missing at all in the week he is grounded for the weekend.
    I completely understand how you feel when it comes to the homework but you have to put your foot down as you know NOW or this will just be an on-going problem.

    Answer by raemommy at 2:13 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • No i dont have a desk. We turn off the tv and we do homework on the dinning table. I have 3 kids. a 4 year old, her and my 5 month old. He does require more attention just because he nurses a lot. My husband doesnt get home until 6pm and usually takes a hour after work to relax before helping me with anything. He has yet to help her in homework but we will see if he can today or i will just do it. I will let her un wind, get a snack. then settle down to do homework

    Answer by aeroslove at 2:25 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

  • Wow sorry for you.My kids dont want to do their homework but they can not refuse to do it so we dont really have this problem thankfully

    Answer by fryshannon34 at 9:51 PM on Sep. 20, 2010

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