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The father of my child left me, what do I do now?

I'm 22 years old, my boyfriend of 2.5yrs and I had talked about having kids, marriage, and a lifetime together. When we found out that I was (surprise!!) pregnant he couldn't have been more excited. 2 months after finding out he decided to try meth (another surprise). He left me. My perfect world has fallen apart and now after trying so hard I don't think he is going to come around. I'm now 27weeks along, alone, and scared. I didn't want this, I wanted it to work, to be a family. It doesn't looks like that's going to happen. I've never felt so betrayed, lonley, and sad. I don't have anyone to talk to. I don't know what to do or where to go from here. He lives with his brother now, calls sometimes, says he wants to be there and then nothing. I know he is still using even though he tells me different. I thought everything would be perfect. Can I do this alone?

 
chris_1988

Asked by chris_1988 at 12:32 PM on Sep. 21, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 4 (37 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • this sucks for you, and you know it-good, you know, that is a big step, sme woman would be thinking otherwise, like he was going to be there, that he was not using

    you are farther along and more strong then you know
    as an outsider looking in, i can see your strength, and you can still have the whole family thing you dreamed of, it will just not include this man. there are agencies out there to help moms who are alone, call around find one or two to help you, go to a group meeting with other moms without the father around, find strength there, also talk to your child, let him or her know that THEY are not alone, you may feel stronger knowing and saying out loud that you are the one who will provide
    wish i could do more, you are strong and others see it, you just have to look in the mirror
    fiatpax

    Answer by fiatpax at 12:37 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • File for child support!!!
    Morgain

    Answer by Morgain at 12:33 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • Put YOUR BABY and YOUR health first. If he is doing meth, WHY would you want him in your lives?

    Take care of yourself and baby. Move on.

    God bless you both.
    AdrianaS

    Answer by AdrianaS at 12:34 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • Yes, you can do it alone, it will be hard, but you can do it!!! If he is using drugs especially meth, you are much better off without him. I would cut ties until he can get clean. You need to move on and do what is best for your baby. Do you have friends or family that can help?? Or a support group in your area??
    skittles1108

    Answer by skittles1108 at 12:35 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • you can do this alone!! I was a single mom for 5 years. You start working on you and putting your life together so you have the best family experience for your child. Get a job, line up childcare and focus on you and your baby. If he is going to be on frugs you dont need him around! Get to church or somewhere and start building a network of friends who can be supportive when baby is born.
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 12:35 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • Pick yourself up and do what you need to for you and your child. Honey, I know it is hard, but waiting on him is going to get you nowhere fast. If I were you, the next time he called I would tell him we had nothing to talk about and to leave me alone. As for the child you are carrying, if I were you I would not even put his name on the birth certificate. Honestly, if he is still using what good can he be for you or the baby?
    mommy11260

    Answer by mommy11260 at 12:36 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • well first of all if he lefted you n ur baby for another one then he wasn,t the right one for you,so just focus on urself n ur baby n when the right time comes ur true guy will be at ur door step.so until then take ur time n remeber this guys are bad news n they don,t like girls thats puts out so if you were putting it out then stop it,n make the guy fall for the real you n not the sex you.
    flmontgomery

    Answer by flmontgomery at 12:54 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • yes you can do it alone! That guy is messed up and probably wont stop using until he ends up in jail. He made the choice dont feel sorry for him and do not give him money or keys to your place!
    okmommy08

    Answer by okmommy08 at 1:05 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

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