Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

5 Bumps

Why is it that when a married woman leaves her husband because of a bad situation, she gets sympathy, but when a SINGLE woman leaves her partner because of a bad situation, she gets told...?

1. "You should have kept your legs closed."
2. "Children deserve both a mother and a father."
3. "You should have made a better choice about who you had a baby with!"

Is it just ME, or does anyone notice this too? Is this just more evidence of the stigma that is attached to single mother?


Asked by Anonymous at 5:54 PM on Sep. 21, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • Personally, I've never understood the stigma around single parents... I mean really, do people think they choose to do things the hard way because it's the "easy way out" or because it's fun? Being a single parent is HARD, no matter how you look at it! Do what is best for you and tell anyone who thinks they know better where they can shove it... I, personally, wouldn't let it get to me!

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 5:59 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • No I think it's because a lot of women who are single mothers get pregnant before they really consider a permanent relationship with the father rather than making a concious choice about being in a long term relationship before having a baby.
    When they are married first, they appear to have made that choice before kids come along.

    It's all in society's perception.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 5:58 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • I hate all those but It's that last one I really can't stand to see people hand out. It's a bit late to be tossing that pissy judgment out there. It's mean and pointless.

    Answer by wildflowers25 at 6:07 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • I have a opinion about this but I will be nice and not say anything.

    Answer by itsallabtthem84 at 5:57 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • I think it is because single women have more liberties. Freedom to leave the relationship as they please.

    Answer by Honestbest at 6:02 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • sounds to me that the people around you need a new perspective. I'd tell them where to shove it, then remind them "women used to have babies at 12 yrs old - and that was considered PAST their prime! Would you consider me a bad person now?" lol

    Answer by shaysmommy5810 at 6:14 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • I think it's all just bs they should mind there own business ! I heard alot of that and made my opinion very clear when I told them all they could go live and support themselves their child plus the babys daddy if they wanted to but I ain't his momma and I ain't supporting him lol now my dh adopted dd and that sorry ass is still living with his momma lol ! and they all see my side now !

    Answer by msh88 at 6:24 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • I just think its upsetting that people can kick a person when they are down. How about treating everyone as human beings, give the person some advice like they are searching for, and go moan at your boyfriend/hubby if you have a judgement about them instead of making it clear to them when they are hurting.....OR failing that just keep out of their question.

    Answer by keyaziz at 6:25 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • I never heard of any woman being treated different. I think it is just as hard for a married woman to be divorced no matter the situation!
    Some people actually say to married women, "Stick it out!"

    Answer by tryin2BGOOD at 6:27 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • i agree with jademom07 & melody77. even though i never heard anyone put a single mother down for leaving a bad situation, where are you that people would be so cruel?


    Answer by 3xangel at 7:17 PM on Sep. 21, 2010