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What would you do if your husband mocked you in front of the kids?

By that I mean imitate you in a sarcastic and demeaning way. I really try not to take the bai because I don't want to argue in front of the kids, but sometimes I am provoked to anger. I have suggested marriage counseling, but he says he doesn't think it will do any good (because he has no faith in "head-shrinkers"), and child care would be a problem.

Has anyone else ever dealt with this successfully? I want to try to save the marriage, but I have to admit that I am not happy. I also don't think it's good for the kids to see this.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:17 PM on Sep. 21, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • My husband fights dirty when we argue. He often results to name calling, insults, and mocking. Basically if he doesn't want to change, save the marriage, or even try then there's no chance. He has to be willing and put forth the effort. You can want it all you want, but if nothing comes from him genuinely it's a lost cause.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 9:21 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • Have you sat down with them and told him exactly how it makes you feel? That kind of attitude is usually hiding some anger or insecurity issues. But you need to get it stopped or your kids will think it's okay to treat you the same way.
    ceallaigh

    Answer by ceallaigh at 9:20 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • Laugh it off in front of the kids or mock him back. Then when the kids arent in the room try to sit down and talk to him about it and see what he does. I had an issue with my fiance doing that. After I talked to him it was good. But if you haven't sat down and talked to him about it then try that.
    ashes_leigh

    Answer by ashes_leigh at 9:56 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • My husband is always jokingly making fun of me. I know he means it in a humorous way, but sometimes it gets to be too much. When it does, I say so. Somestimes, it is inappropriate, and I tell him. He usually appologizes. I won't tolerate that **** from my son. Period. I determine how my son views me. I stand up to his father when he's being an idiot. But I also take his crap good humoredly, so my son sees that it's not Daddy being mean, intentionally.
    BisketLiss

    Answer by BisketLiss at 9:30 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • Mock him back. Don't get mad get even and as hard as it is I usually handle it the way I want my dtrs to handle it if they are ever in my shoes.
    KARRIEMARIE

    Answer by KARRIEMARIE at 9:38 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • Thank you for the good advice, all of you. Right at this moment he's asleep and I want to avoid him. After 21 years I've learned not to even try to talk to him when he has a certain temperament.

    I have tried telling him how it makes me feel, but I will try again. I will also try to arrange child care in the near future and ask him to go with me to marriage counseling. I just have to be prepared to support the family financially if that brings it all to a head and he leaves. That would be very hard on the kids, but what we have now is not too healthy either.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:22 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • Hey, If you have been with him 21 years, you know, him better than "US"?

    I would of smack the shit outta him the first time.........

    Here if you need a friend or help ♥♥♥♥
    SissyAnn141

    Answer by SissyAnn141 at 10:59 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • Your husband is really setting a poor example for your children after all children learn from what they see. They will grow up and treat their spouse the same way and think it's ok. Don't put up with this bad behavior, if he refuses to stop or won't see a counselor then ditch him he doesnt care about you anyway. Let him know you mean business.
    Momabear455

    Answer by Momabear455 at 11:29 PM on Sep. 21, 2010

  • Thanks. Honestly I think he is bipolar, but just try getting him to a doc to get a diagnosis. One time I convinced him to seek counseling (because his personality problems cost him his job - our only income), but the therapist was a kook and said, "Why should you change? Why not be different?"

    I think he does care, but he doesn't realize how much of a jerk he is being.

    My big mistake (IMO) was having sex with him before we got married. That creates an emotional attachment and makes it hard to be impartial when deciding about marriage.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:37 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

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