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How can I get my 5yr old to understand that he doens't have to fight all the time?

He is five years old and he just seems to like the confrontation. He will be outside and it wont be five minutes before someone is yelling that he hit them or kicked over there toys. I keep wondering if he is dealing with his father leaving for Korea like this or is this a period we are going to weather through. I don't like that no one wants to play with him, but I don't know what else to do. Time outs don't work. Taking away his toys aren't working. HELP!!!!

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Asked by luchousdiva at 11:15 PM on Oct. 19, 2008 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

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Answers (3)
  • I would think that is does have something to do with his father leaving. I would try talking to him about his feelings. I would also try not to get angry and take things away. Try being positive and say something like "if you can play nicely then we will go get an ice cream".

    If he is having a hard time then he might be acting out for the attention. Positive reinforcement might work better in this case.

    If it gets really bad I would suggest taking him to a therapist. I know when my son went they taught how to deal with his feelings and how to not act out or be violent.

    Good Luck

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 8:27 AM on Oct. 20, 2008

  • Strict discipline. Consequences for his actions is what's required. Forget about taking the toys away and putting him on time are so use to that form of discipline that they have become immune to it...instead of sticking to the norm do something that will strictly get his attention and that is to say what you mean and mean what you say...

    Answer by treasured_hope at 1:28 PM on Oct. 20, 2008

  • You need to sit down and talk to him. REALLY talk to him. Let him know how much his dad leaving hurts you to, it may help him to unload some of his grief. Let him know that you know that sometimes when people are hurting they want to take it out on everybody else but we just can't do that. Just have a heart to heart about how you both REALLY feel.

    Answer by imtheonlysane1 at 3:21 PM on Oct. 20, 2008

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