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marriage

i been with my husband for 8years and he has no job lies to me about takeing out loans and we are barly making ends meet last week my parents had to pay my electric bill but it just dont seem like he wants to even help around the house or do anything but sit on his fat but i love him and want to stay with him for my son but i dont think i can put up with this anymore what should i do

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CarlaJean99

Asked by CarlaJean99 at 4:09 PM on Sep. 22, 2010 in Relationships

Level 6 (124 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • how is able to take out loans if he has no job?
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 4:10 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • he has his ways of getting loans and most people give him one just cause his wife has job and he does get a little unemployment
    CarlaJean99

    Comment by CarlaJean99 (original poster) at 4:13 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • It sounds like you need to figure out if you really want to be with him at all. Either way - do what is best for you and your little boy.

    I wish you the best of luck!
    ajc88

    Answer by ajc88 at 4:14 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • My personal view is this.

    My marriage is a joint partnership. So If I were in your situation/having this type of experience this is what I would do:

    A) first course of action. Talk with my husband and try to get him onthe same page as I.. Meaning, try to get him to understand the need and importance of employment and the importance of a steady income to our family.

    B) Fincially support our family myself. I would never live for years with my husband being unemployed or skipping from one job to the next with long bouts of unemployment in between. If I had chosen to marry a man like this, or if my husband showed that this was the type he was. I would take control and be the financial supporter of my family.

    C) If neither of those worked. Or my husband was unwilling to work with me in regards to either of those things. I would divorce. No point in my being unhappy and living in a situation I don't need to live in
    pixie_trix

    Answer by pixie_trix at 4:18 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • you have two choices-1.stay and things stay the same and accept him being this way cause you can't change him 2. take control of what you can change and leave him so that you are happier and so is your child. you don't want your child growing up thinking and seeing what a man is is what his father is. which isn't very good if you ask me. we are our childrens' example and they learn from us.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 4:27 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • ask yourself why ur willing to put up with that a man tht has no respect for you and if he really loved u would want to be a man and take the burden off his woman , are u just used to him or co dependant? be honest with yourself sometimes its hard to do but its necessary for things to change. remember you can not make him change , he will only change if he wants to. good luck
    bekkaboo89

    Answer by bekkaboo89 at 9:33 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • under no circumstances stay with him just for the sake of your son---and if you truly think you love him--i think there's a chance you don't---you need counseling with him (to try and remedy the situation) or without him to leave
    sadie51

    Answer by sadie51 at 9:46 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • You love him and want to stay ?

    Why are you asking us ???

    Tell him, to get a dam job .

    He is using you.....
    SissyAnn141

    Answer by SissyAnn141 at 11:00 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

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