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10 Bumps

How do you explain to your son/daughter that daddy isn't coming back?

Especially when their are major problems in the relationship.


Asked by TwannaB. at 10:01 PM on Sep. 22, 2010 in Relationships

Level 14 (1,407 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (21)
  • i have read in domestic violence literature and alcoholism literature, and my counselors, because i am separated... and they say (which i did) to be respectful of you rchildren's feelings and sit them there and just tell them straight and appropriate for their age, you can give a reason (which i did and my counselor said GOOD) is that "he didnt knwo how to be kind or gentle, or happy, and treat me with respect., he is getting some help withthat, i am not sure what is goign to happen btu it looks liek this will be a long time type of thing, okay? I didn't expect it either but it is best for us, you will see and I will talk more to you about it as we go. if you have any questions you can always ask me. do you have any now? and then be honest but not blunt... you can say yes you still care or not too muchm but i did care, etc. they just want to know all will be okay now, and say he is still your own dad. don't speak for dad,

    Answer by silverelf at 10:07 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • Tell them the truth. They ll understand. Yes they will probsbly be upset, mad and have questions. Be strong and answer them the best u can

    Answer by redrose36 at 10:05 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • i really don't know but good luck!!

    Answer by Smiley001 at 10:03 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • IDK depends on the age of the kids. Depends on the situation.

    Answer by 2BlondeBabies at 10:04 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • Tell them the truth. If they are on the younger side. Just keep telling them daddy has gone bye bye and eventually they'll stop asking and then you can tell them the truth when they get old enough to understand

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 10:06 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • i would be honest that mommy and daddy dont love each other and (hopefully) it doesnt mean daddy doesnt love your child. lying to a child may grow up to resent you so be honest and just make sure you explain slowly so not to confuse. my dad had to explain about my mom to me at 4 yo but he let me know that she chose not to be apart of my life not because of anything i did but that she just needed to be by herself and that as my daddy he had more than enough love to take over the love she couldnt give me. i was happy to have my dad. i didnt really like my mom for what she had done to me and for what she was doing to my dad. good luck i hope everything works out for you

    Answer by pinkdena at 10:06 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • they may be slightly relieved.. many peopel writing later say they resented their mom for NOT leaving! and felt a relief when the tension was gone. it's better they say to BE from a broken home than grow up IN one.

    Answer by silverelf at 10:08 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • Is he not coming back to live. Is he coming back to see them. Does he still love them? Will he see them in a different setting.
    Saying he is not coming back,is like saying he is dead.

    Answer by tootoobusy at 10:12 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • Always try and be honest with them. They'll be mad at you, but at least you are with them and he walked out. He can't answer them while you will be there to answer. A friend of mine says he oldest still blames her for dad walking out on them, but he appreciates she was always honest with them as well. Good luck.

    Answer by Danaefm at 10:16 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • There are books to help you with this kind of thing, children's books that you would read to them.

    Answer by lovinangels at 10:18 PM on Sep. 22, 2010