Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

32 Bumps

why do we do this to each other?

Why is it that moms can be so judgemental on others for their choices...from how to raise there children to if the mother is a SAHM or working mom....We all have to provide the best for our children and if that means being a SAHM or working then so be it...Why do moms feel that their way of raising children is the best and others are wrong...or doing it wrong....What makes your way the best....Do you ever stop to see what you may be doing wrong? Husbands, wives, children and family in general are all different for many reasons....How boring do you think this world would be if everyone did the same thing...looked the same way and so on? Why do we do this to each other? We are the ones (dads too, other family members) who teach children to be the best they to judge, fight, call names,and so on but yet we do this to others? We should admire and learn from our differences...(unless harmful to our children)...


Asked by Anonymous at 10:15 PM on Sep. 22, 2010 in Parenting Debate

This question is closed.
Answers (32)
  • clapping

    Thank you.  You have put my feelings into words.  Every time I read a post with one type of mom bashing another on this site I think exactly this....  I just get too angry to write it down lol....YAY YOU!


    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 2:47 AM on Sep. 24, 2010

  • I will never, EVER judge someone for their parenting choices, unless they are willfully harming their child in a physical or emotional way. I am with you Anon - I grow SO tired of these self-righteous women who think their way is the only right way to do things. I actually feel sorry for them, now that I think about it, because it must be a truly miserable way to live - there is no joy in constantly judging and spewing hatred.

    Answer by aliceryannesmom at 10:21 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • That's because women are judgmental by nature. Sadly, they/we really can't help it. I think the "do as I say, not as I do" credo is law here.

    Answer by DMac08 at 10:25 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • Amen!

    Answer by Finkette at 10:17 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • Fear... Women who attack because of petty differences do so out of fear that they could be wrong. They jump to accuse others and defend themselves as a way to hide their fear... To bad it doesn't work!

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 10:56 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • I don't judge people. It's not our place to judge other people and how we raise our children. We are all raised differently and parenting styles differ in more ways than anyone can possibly imagine. None of us are perfect and I also realize that our children aren't perfect either. But each of us have to accept each other for who we are, not by what other people think.

    Answer by amessageofhope at 1:30 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • I agree. I am very much a work in progress and have much to learn... which is not to say that my experiences, education and resulting advice do not have value or merit.. but I definitely do not even begin to presume that my way is the "right" way for anyone/everyone else... it's just what has worked for me or my advice sometimes comes from lessons I have learned by doing things that have been the "wrong" way for us... learning from my mistakes.

    Answer by FeelinYummy at 10:53 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • Preach!!! I think its sad we are this way. If we didn't judge each other, but embraced each other and helped each other.... we could accomplish so much.

    Answer by 4xsthetrouble at 3:56 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • I think some it comes from insecurity, perhaps jealousy, and unhappiness. I don't know about the current generation but I remember the women's lib movement. What I embrace from that is that women have choices; choices that maybe our mothers and grandmothers didn't have - yet it seems today's generation is forcing ladies to choose one or the other and either way, it'll be the wrong choice in someone's eyes. I've been on both sides of the fence - working & SAHM - I was judged by people regardless of which situation I was in. Didn't matter, I was happy doing what I was doing and needed to do what was right for me and my family. Seems all this angst and energy could be put to better use.

    Answer by FootballMom85 at 6:55 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • as long as you feed your kids, who cares what you feed them, as long as you provide for your kds, who cares if it is at home or by work, as long as you dicipline your kids with love, who cares if youspank or you dont! As long as you let your children know that they are loved, who cares if you ave 1 or 15 kids! I am with you, and I have been harsh on things before, but generally it is because I feel attacked! Good job OP! ANd his shuld be read by ALL on here!

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 10:26 AM on Sep. 23, 2010