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I want my stepdaughter's mother to leave my husband alone. She only uses their daughter as a way to communicate with him! What do I do?!

The mother is a drug abuser and has been deemed as unable to care for her child unsupervised. Her parents are somewhat easier to get along with, and the Dept of Social Services say that it is okay for us to soley communicate with them; however, the mother will not quit texting and calling my husband. We are expecting OUR first child and I feel like now more than ever she is trying to communicate with him even after he has plainly told her to leave him alone!! Any advice.. please help!!!!!!

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:44 PM on Sep. 22, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • I think it just has to come from your husband. If you say anything to her it will just fuel her fire and make her want to do it even more. If there is no contact needed, maybe he needs to change his number and make sure that if her parents want it they agree to not give it to anyone. GL! :)

    Answer by young-not-dumb at 11:47 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • I would have your dh change his number, since dhs says its okay just to soley talk to her parents thats what should be going on. He has already tried telling her nicely to not call him and she isnt responding. Either that or block her texts or calls but she could always use another number to call from.

    Answer by okmommy08 at 11:48 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • If it's that serious, i'd have him get a restraining order.

    Answer by lovinangels at 11:49 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • i would have dh change his number and if her parents want some communication, then they can call u.

    Answer by gabby06 at 11:50 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • I'd feel like harassment to me. If she doesn't want to stop, my suggestion would be to warn her about getting a restraining order. It would get her to stop harassing u guys. Plus it's not healthy for u and ur unborn child's life.

    Answer by istealcookies at 11:50 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • Give her your phone number. Call her up and tell her you want her to call and give directions or information to the adults in this childs life. Good luck.

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 11:57 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • He's tried to change the number but the grandparents keep giving it to her or either shes stealing it out of their phones. He also warned recently about the restraining order and the next day she text his phone like nothing was said. I hate to go so far as to take out a restraining order but I feel like it's the only option!! She only makes the entire situation harder on everyone, and I hate to know that this is the kind of nonsense and ignorance I am going to have to deal with for the rest of our lives!

    Answer by als9008 at 11:58 PM on Sep. 22, 2010

  • i know just how you feel. my husband and i have been married for 3 yrs and he has a son with an old girlfriend of his. (we share custody). she couldnt stand that we were together and when we got married it got worse, she was so jelous. she would call and text constntly even when he told her to stop and if it was about their son then she could call. i finally had to get rude with her and told her in person ALONG with my husband to stop! in not the greatset words, but it had to be done. we just had our 1st child together and she is super jelous still but keeps her distance. i hate that my stepson has to get brainwashed by her when he is at her house. she tells him to not listen to me and to not hug me or kiss me. but he does anyway. its her thats thats showing her true colors to her own son. he always asks me why she says bad words and is mean.

    Answer by king0913 at 12:07 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • Like the previous posters, have him change his number -or block hers and all communication from her can go through you. It will only enable her if you don't do something. Don't react just take action..... Good luck !!

    Answer by LeJane at 12:34 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • You didn't say how old the daughter is, but does she ever say anything about it? If Social Services say that you can communicate with the parents, just communicate with them. With the history of the child's mother, have you thought of a restraining order or getting her to give up her parental rights? Your husband needs to tell her to leave you alone. Anything that is said or done with their daughter should only be discussed with the two of them. Tell him that you don't want to deal with her, that it's his responsibility to deal with her. In the meantime, change your phone numbers.

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:59 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

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