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How do you handle your MIL without being to rude?

Ok, my MIL knows everything. LOL when my husband was little she was out alot and her mom raised my husband. She sits there and tells me how to handle my children. She always told me she wasn't to involved because at the time of life it was all about her. I am trying to let her talk and let it go in one ear and out the other but how do I do this without seeming rude?

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Asked by mommy2each at 10:04 AM on Sep. 23, 2010 in Relationships

Level 16 (2,456 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • I would just tell her that while you appreciate the assistance, you really don't need the advise.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 10:07 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • It's impossible =)

    Answer by Lisa.Price at 10:07 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • Just tell her that you appreciate her advice, but that you don't need it. Tell her you don't want to sound like an ass, but that you learn better on your own than when someone is telling you what to do.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 10:09 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • The best way is to say excuse me. I have to use the bathroom and pull your self together in there lol, and try to change the subject when you come out. This worked best for me as a mom she wants to help but sometimes it can be fustrating. I also told her times have changed, and let her know I value her opinion but would rather do it my way. :) In a joking type of way.

    I went through what your going through, I miss her. She is not here with us anymore. I am not with him anymore, but she will always be my MIL.

    Funny how things change...

    Answer by KFree907 at 10:14 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • Choose your words wisely and keep your voice at a normal level. AND Do not say anything in front of anyone else. I like to catch my MIL alone or with my FIL. I rarely, if ever, do it in front of my husband. I let him handle it when she says stupid things. And usually I can just look at him and he knows to change the subject. ...... Good Luck.

    Answer by eluc at 10:15 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • you can say "we all learn from our mistakes, and i will eventually make mistakes along the way, that way i will learn how to correct them next time"

    and add in "i'm not a perfect parent."

    Answer by americansugar80 at 10:17 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • .....I don't think I could hold my cool. lol. ....but that may be bc I have the most evil, annoying MIL in the world! lol

    Answer by Kword at 10:25 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • IDK my MIL was off the chain in our bussiness decorating my house telling me how to arrange my furniture, how to raise my boys when she abviously didnt do a good job on her son(my x husband)

    Answer by melissac9903 at 10:40 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • My MIL can be a little opinionated at times and often offers me advice. Sometimes I appreciate it and sometimes I find it frustrating or annoying. First, I try to remember she comes from a place of love and wants what's best for us so her heart is in the right place even if we don't agree on methods all the time. I try never to argue with her because that's pointless, if she has a differing opinion about things I sometimes explain why I do it a certain way, i.e. I read it in a book or was advised by the doctor, etc. Otherwise, I usually use really vague and non-committed phrases like "Oh, that's an interesting idea. I'll think about that." Or, "that's something to consider" and "I'll mention that to her father/doctor/teacher, etc" Basically things to make it seem like I might take the advice even if I don't intend to use it. If MIL was really pushy that might not work, but it usually makes her feel heard and ends the talk.

    Answer by MaryMW at 11:53 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • I smile and nod (like a bobble head) and let it go in one ear and out the other. I try not to argue my point b/c as I've recently learned, it is POINTLESS.

    Answer by thankful4itall at 11:15 PM on Sep. 23, 2010

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