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I will never understand so I will continue to ask :)

I wasn't really raised around kids or know much about what type of phases kids go through having only one child so I ask because I don't know :) lately, the past 2 weeks or so, my son who turns 3 in Nov seems to say things like " I don't like you" or "I don't love you" last night we stopped at my moms and she went to try to give him a hug and he said " I don't love you ma, I only love my mom" if he's playing and we want to join in he says, "NO i don't like you, I don't want you to play with me " he does go to daycare if that matters, if that is something picked up at daycare, would I talk to her about it or is this normal part of kids learning feelings? I tell him its not a nice thing to say and tell him we can love mommies, daddies and other people at the same time ..


Asked by maxsmom11807 at 11:27 AM on Sep. 23, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 29 (40,703 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • He may have picked it up from another kid at his daycare, or he may be having a hard time saying exactly what he does mean. I think you did fine. I think the behavoir will stick longer if you make too big of a deal about it. Mine haven't said that yet, but I think when they do I'll say,"Aww, that's so sad. I really love you." I can remember my older one being tired and cranky one morning at about that age, and she didn't really know how to express that - she said, "I don't want to go to school. I don't like my friends. I'm just going to be mean to my friends."

    Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 11:42 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • Keep in mind that they learn the things that get a reaction. My DD is still going thru this at almost 4. Only she tells me that I'm not her best friend anymore. I just respond by saying, "that's ok, I'll always be your mommy and I will always love you".

    so if you react strongly to them saying I don't like you, they will keep saying it.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 11:33 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • Normal and something picked up. LOL You handled it properly. Very good job. Just explain and demonstrate..he will catch on.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 11:29 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • Very normal, its just frustrating. For my youngest when he began that phase, it was because he just didn't have the vocabulary necessary to really put into feelings when he was mad so it came out as a simple 'I don't like you'.

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 11:34 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • the first couple times he did it I took him aside and told him it wasn't nice and to tell daddy he was sorry for saying he didn't like him and told him we don't say things like that -do you think that was too much of a reaction? should I just tell my husband and everyone to tell him that's ok, we still love you , type of things? My niece was so hurt the first time he did it to her, she's only 10 and been his big sister almost - and truly, even though I thought it was just a "kid" thing or phase, my husband was sad by it and takes things a little more personally.. even though he does understand he's only a child too..

    Comment by maxsmom11807 (original poster) at 11:38 AM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • I would let the other adults and your niece know what's going on and encourage them to tell him it's sad or it's ok and that they love him. I think I'd also talk to the daycare provider to ask if he is doing it there and see how's she's handling it.


    Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 11:47 AM on Sep. 23, 2010