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How do I ask my DH if..

Okay, so my Mother met a guy who runs poker games. She started a few weeks ago.. She serves food, soda, coffee & beer.. Theres no hard liqour.. She is about to learn how to deal.. She said the guy said I can come & serve the drinks and food. Its only two nights per week (Mon & Fri).. She said I can make a couple hundred bucks working just these two days. I would love to do it just so I have some money to call my own (currently a SAHM).. But I dont think my DH will let me do it, so Im kind of scared to ask, even though I wouldnt be doing anything wrong, but hes a little bit crazy with stuff like this.. Because it will be mostly men playing the poker.. Ive never cheated on him anything to make him not trust me, but hes the same way even if I want to go out with the girls.. I think hes just insecure (his ex cheated on him, but weve been together for 6 yrs almost).. I dont know how to bring it up without him shooting me down.. ???


Asked by Anonymous at 7:35 PM on Sep. 23, 2010 in Money & Work

This question is closed.
Answers (3)
  • Be sure that when you bring it up that it's a good time to do so. Don't do it while he's preoccupied or tired. When you ask, make sure you let him know first thing that his approval on what your about to ask means a lot to you. Give him the scenario and if he's uncomfortable with it, don't argue. Kindly suggest that you could make up some "ground rules" that would help reassure him. If he's not for that, then I would just leave it at that and tell him thank you for listening. (That kind of respect might slowly start to work on him in the back of his head and might soften him up a bit.) I know that's not what a lot of people would recommend. My thought is: if you are asking him, then you are giving him a chance to have a say in the outcome and should be prepared that he might not see things the same. However, if he is controlling what you do b/c of abusive tendencies, then you have a larger issue to consider.

    Answer by Katjafish at 7:46 PM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • If he has trust issues even though you've been together for 6 years, then there isn't much hope of anything is there? I mean, you've pretty much already decided that he's going to say no, so why bother asking?

    Now if you want to change that attitude, I say go up to him, explain to him what you've explained to us and hope for the best.

    Answer by thatgirl70 at 7:40 PM on Sep. 23, 2010

  • To be honest with you my DH probably would feel the same as yours, but it doesn't hurt for you to ask. Be honest with him. That's the best way. Tell him you want to help your Family's financial needs a bit. There is no harm in asking. I also wanted to let you know that I work from home, and I help other Moms work from home as well. I love it! I am a stay at home Mommy to my 3 year old son, and 18 month old daughter. I work with a great team of Moms; we help each other create income from home. No parties, No inventory! Weekly pay! Free website, training, and unlimited support!!
    I would love to give you more information and help you reach your financial goals!

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    Answer by mommy2joeynabby at 7:43 PM on Sep. 23, 2010

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