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Husband has rights to more than pregnant wife for food.?

This bugs me a friend has a spouse that tells her they never have enough to go out to eat or for foods she needs for the babies nutrition or what she can eat and will not throw up from.
So she basically has to find ways to scrap for making a meal over what may be in the kitchen.
Now,he spends money all the time for cigarettes,burger king.
I suggested maybe government progrmas to help her where he can't say anything but she does not qualify due to income guidelines.
He feels being he works he should get these rights over her.
He needs to eat becausehe is busy providing.
She suggested they can both go out to eat if she was to make him lunch or homemade meals to heat in the breakroom.
When she asks for cheese or chocolate on his way to buy cigarettes,i seen him roll his eyes.
Just do not now what to say or suggest to a situaiton that needs to change,she wants my advice otherwise i would stay out of it.?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:22 PM on Oct. 20, 2008 in Pregnancy

Answers (17)
  • Personally I would move out and in with a friend or family member who is willing to provide the food that she needs. She should tell him that she needs food for herself and his baby, when he's ready to provide that for her, she will come home.

    Answer by toriandgrace at 5:25 PM on Oct. 20, 2008

  • Oh wow, what a damn dickhead. Im really sorry to hear that about your friend. And if you ask me, she should throw him out. Because there shouldnt be anything more important than the health of the baby and healthy food of course!

    Answer by m.robertson811 at 5:26 PM on Oct. 20, 2008

  • i had that happen to me with my ex he was such a mmm nice words dont even explain lol but i was like never eating right because of him see if she can go down to the wic offices and see if they can do it without his income try explaining it to them it worked for me in oklahoma

    Answer by iloveyall2008 at 5:27 PM on Oct. 20, 2008

  • If she has a mom or family, I would suggest she move in with them. This guy doesn't sound like a very good guy if he doesn't care that she isn't eating. I would also suggest she get a job if she can. I don't know how far along she is, but she should not stand to be treated like this. If she leaves him, she qualifies for help through the Department of Social Services because she has no income. She should also look into local food banks.

    Answer by cdgoldilocks at 5:33 PM on Oct. 20, 2008

  • Sounds like a controlling and abusive husband. It's up to your friend to figure out the situation. She can always leave him if he treats her so badly and then she would qualify for benefits, but my guess is she "loves" him and won't leave him. With a man like that, there's nothing anyone can say to him to change who he is. I feel sorry for your friend.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:37 PM on Oct. 20, 2008


    She can't get a job due to being on bed rest,should of added that to why his comment on why he deserves things since he provides is so cruel,she is providing for thier unborn baby.
    She really has no family,is really sweet i'm trying to help her but need to see what else i can do.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:40 PM on Oct. 20, 2008

  • She would leave but,until the baby is born she needs to care for the safety of the baby with these restrictions.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:42 PM on Oct. 20, 2008

  • He obviously selfish. He is smoking when they don't have money for food?! Cigarettes are a luxury not a necessity even if he is addicted to nicotine. He needs to grow up and deal with it. She needs to put her foot down and tell him he is being a schmuck. She is pregnant and if she doesn't eat right then it could cause problems for the baby.

    Answer by Momby4kids at 5:46 PM on Oct. 20, 2008

  • I have went to the pantries for her but the amount they give is a small bag,enough for maybe a week and you get what you get,some of the items can be things to make food like cookie cutters which is not to helpful.
    I would let her move in with me if i had the room.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:47 PM on Oct. 20, 2008

  • Well, she could go to a Women's shelter if it got bad enough. He is abusing her by withholding money for food and necessities.

    Answer by cdgoldilocks at 5:49 PM on Oct. 20, 2008

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