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2nd baby

have a 4 month onld little girl, and im already thinking about another one. I was 6 years younger than my bro and my sis was 6 years younger than me and we never got along; and i hated that. I tried talking to my fiancee about it but he keeps telling me to wait and blah blah blah. but i dont think its fair that he is telling me to wait. statistics show that it can take a normal couple a year to get pregnant. im not saying i want to start stressing and "trying" but i also dont want to do anything to prevent it. Do you think its fair for him to tell me no when im the one thats going to be carrying a new baby while taking care of an infant. Im a SAHM and have babysat many infants and truely think i can handle it. he said he wouldnt mind if it happened but he keeps insisting on using condoms to prevent it...any advice

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:54 PM on Oct. 20, 2008 in Trying to Conceive

Answers (4)
  • Even if you want another baby more than anything, you shouldn't get pregnant unless you and your fiancee are in agreement on that. It takes two to raise a baby (even if you are a SAHM, I'd assume you are reliant upon your fiancee for money and moral support). If he isn't ready, than you can't rush that. Trust me, it's a battle I'm currently fighting myself. If you are trying to convince him to try for another, do the best you can being a SAHM - if you make it seem easy, and he's getting everything he wants out of if, I'm sure he'll jump on the bandwagon before too long. Hope this helps!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:15 PM on Oct. 20, 2008

  • You two need to be in agreement...AND your doc needs to clear you for another pregnancy.

    AGE makes no difference in how sibs get along. The closest sibling I know were a decade apart. The ones who hated each other the most? 18 months apart.

    It's the upbringing, NOT the age. In the cases where the sibs hated each other, the parents played the kids against each other. In the cases where the sibs were close, the parents gave the same age-appropriate treatment.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 8:00 PM on Oct. 20, 2008

  • I agree that your doctor needs to clear you for another pregnancy...especially if you happened to have had a c-section. It's best that your body take a little time to recover either way. Since your new baby is only four months old, you're probably very fertile and could easily become pregnant the first time you have sex without birth control. My advice is to wait until your first one is at least a year old before you stop using any form of birth control. That way your body can recover, your new baby will hopefully be sleeping through the night, and your significant other will probably be more comfortable with having another one.
    whittany_h

    Answer by whittany_h at 11:15 PM on Oct. 20, 2008

  • I was 7 years younger than my sister,and i dont think we would have got along if we were 1 yr apart neither
    i like when their close in ages
    my girls will be a little over 2 years apart i will not lie i couldnt handle a newborn and an infant,
    i would like to get to know my first child before i brought another one to this world,and raise them as a bunch

    I spent 2 whole years with my daughter and got to know her and love her for who she honestly is, without other kids grabbing on my pant leg trying to get my attention,
    I would wait not because of your feelings,

    Just because of your 4 month old, he or she needs his mommys attention for a little longer before you just say okay i want another,

    BUT THATS MHO,

    im not saying your going to drop one kid for the next,
    but you will do this by mistake, not being aware of your actions,

    LexsiesMommy

    Answer by LexsiesMommy at 11:17 AM on Oct. 21, 2008

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