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Why do 'family events' at the in-laws have to be such an ordeal?!

today was my SIL's 21st birthday, so we all went over for a family dinner... but EVERY time its the same shit over and over, MIL is "exhausted" after cooking so much food (even though she doesn't really make that much more then usual or that extravagent or anything) and is loud and kinda grouchy, FIL is loud, but thankfully not drunk this time @@ (he just goes outside and plays with the dogs so its not so bad) and my 2 SILs are LOUD and being catty and bitchy to each other... and dh's grandma is chainsmoking like crazy in front of my kids <.< dh and his cousin went and "prepared" before hand (in other words got high) and I"M the only one left sober, and responsible for the kids and after about 30min I have a huge headache and can not WAIT to get out of there... I feel bad for hating these 'events' because i know the kids love them but it is so freakin annoying! anyone else have to put up with something like this?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:41 PM on Sep. 24, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • Fortunately, No.
    Events with my in laws are more relaxing than events with my own family.
    Sorry you go through this.
    layh41407

    Answer by layh41407 at 9:42 PM on Sep. 24, 2010

  • It sounds like your husband's side of the family really sucks...I prefer my in-laws family gatherings to my own family's gatherings; my in-laws are totally casual, my family is totally formal!
    SarahLeeMorgan

    Answer by SarahLeeMorgan at 9:44 PM on Sep. 24, 2010

  • No, I lie about being busy!
    In fact today I went to another county to meet a friend; to keep my sisters from staying here through the weekend.
    REALLY... I am spending a nice quiet weekend at home with my Hubby and DD. We plan to go to the mountains, and watch a movie this weekend.
    tryin2BGOOD

    Answer by tryin2BGOOD at 9:45 PM on Sep. 24, 2010

  • this is my every day life!! my husband is the loudest ever.. i can handle having about 12 kids in my house every weekend but when he is home i go crazy...n to make matters worse my loud brother is here ALL the time...oh n they ride dirt bike n 4 wheeler ALL the time
    hiswifey0725

    Answer by hiswifey0725 at 9:45 PM on Sep. 24, 2010

  • after 9 years of the in laws i'm used to them it took a while b/c there are so many people but they have always made me feel welcome and like a part of the family some of them annoy me but i just ignore them and go about my business
    josiesmommy00

    Answer by josiesmommy00 at 10:09 PM on Sep. 24, 2010

  • Oh I am sorry!
    My inlaws were very quiet and proper peoole. They were old fashioned and used clean language. We rarely drink unless it was a special occasion an then it was just a glass of wine. Then ,my family was like that too. We had a good time but there were no loud outbursts or disagreements. I guess were are all just lucky that way.
    gertie41

    Answer by gertie41 at 10:09 PM on Sep. 24, 2010

  • Sounds like life on my mom's mom's side of the family. My grandfather came from a very proper family in Europe, raised with governesses and pretty much on the quiet side. Grandma's brothers and their families were loud, Loud, LOUD. Poor grandpa put up with 50 years of this all because he adored my grandma and wanted me to have a relationship with family (mom & I were both only children.)

    Take some advil before hand and be as happy as you can that these crazy people are there. My family and DH's never invite us for dinners or anything. I'd put up with loud if I had to do it.
    balagan_imma

    Answer by balagan_imma at 10:17 PM on Sep. 24, 2010

  • The only thing I can suggest is that instead of your MIL cooking everything, why doesn't each person bring a dish? Just decide on what you're bringing ahead of time and see what everyone else is planning to bring. That way nobody will bring the same dish. We use to do that all the time. Or better yet, everybody goes out to eat. At least I would think that nothing would happen in public, I hope!
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:37 AM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • Nope I used to but I decided until that person tries to do better, i'm not coming back around because I only visit people by choice that I enjoy being around. If I don't enjoy them i'm not going period.
    SylviaNCali

    Answer by SylviaNCali at 1:35 AM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • I can relate, on my ex's side of the family nothin' but drama! Even our son doesn't like being around them. I believe my mother refered to them as "white trash from the wrong side of the tracks". Man was love ever blind for me! Good luck, you need it!
    Abytome

    Answer by Abytome at 3:16 AM on Sep. 25, 2010

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