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what level of affection are you getting, and what level do you WANT?

does your man/partner tell you youre beautiful every day or so? mine none of them, ever did even tho i am. also, i like to be romantic-kissed every day. none of them ever did that either. do yours? i am SOOO curious if peopel are gettin gwhat i have wanted so long and now i'm 40 lol yay. like do you get snugled or come up behind at the sink and hugged or grabbed and taken for a tickle on the bed? playful affection adn romatic stuff? any tips?

 
silverelf

Asked by silverelf at 10:56 AM on Sep. 25, 2010 in Relationships

Level 16 (3,114 Credits)
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Answers (13)
  • It just started to happening to me. I didn't ever get, you look nice, i like your hair,I love you, nothing. we seperated for two months and when i came back things changed. I started getting the I love you, You look nice, the rubbing my body,didn't ever get that, hitting me on da butt when I'm standin in da mirror, very affectionate and it feels sooo good. you need that,let him know you need that and if he does nothing, you have to change things. Not to be tit for tat, but, if its something he wants you to do,don't until he starts doing things for you. You can't make him happy if you're not happy.
    mrs2323

    Answer by mrs2323 at 1:19 AM on Sep. 26, 2010

  • Give to him what you'd love to recieve. He may reciprocate! Don't let the feeling of pressure permeate, do it in fun and in love and without expectation. You may be delightfully surpised!
    NikkiMomof2grls

    Answer by NikkiMomof2grls at 11:00 AM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • My DH is overly romantic... He's the touchy feeling, lovey dovey kind... It drives me nuts, because I'm not like that. Everytime he comes in the room, leaves the room, walks past me, anything... He's hugging, kissing, touching, hanging on me... And now that I'm pregnant again, it's even worse cause he can't keep him hands off my belly either... I'm more of a love me from afar kind of person... I don't see a need for all the extra stuff. So, yes, I get all that, I just don't want it the majority of the time. That's just not the type of person I am. On the other hand, it IS the type of person HE is, it comes naturally to him.

    That said, maybe you should play hard to get, it seems like the more I try and push him off me the more he's on me...
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 11:01 AM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • I'm very lucky. I wake up to "good morning, beautiful" every morning. We are very loving to each other, he still holds doors for me, and we hold hands. I'm 40, and I went through an awful first marriage (13 years), being told I expected too much - then I found my current DH.

    Have you talked to your DH about it? Are you being loving/affectionate toward him and he doesn't reciprocate? Did he "'used" to do things like that and stopped? Sometimes just a good conversation will change things for the better!
    Scuba

    Answer by Scuba at 11:03 AM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • That said, maybe you should play hard to get, it seems like the more I try and push him off me the more he's on me...

    I agree. The lever of affection I get is around 90% and the level I want is around 50%. I never was a romantic..
    mysevenkids

    Answer by mysevenkids at 11:05 AM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • Very romantic... He's the touchy feeling, lovey dovey kind,I'm very lucky. I wake up to "good morning, beautiful" every morning. We are very loving to each other, he still holds doors for me, and we hold hands he sends me roses everyweek. I woke up today with a note of i love you and the smell of a wonderful breakfast he made with the girls ...
    MTM

    Answer by MTM at 11:08 AM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • Both of us are pretty darn unromantic and under most circumstances we're on the same page. The one thing I have talked with him about amping up is his demonstration of sexual interest in me. Sure, he's interested, but he will wait seemingly forever until I say "Hose it off and drag it in here for the love of Pete, Mama Horny!"
    Fistandantalus

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 11:13 AM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • I'm getting 0 level of affection right now..... (hubbys wont be home for another 6-8months)
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 11:15 AM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • I get a good amount of affection from the DH, he's probably more affectionate than I am. I really just have to comunicate the amount I want at the time and he listens, usually
    Liz132

    Answer by Liz132 at 11:29 AM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • My Dh is socially shy and doesn't initiate anything. He's always reciprocal if I initiate, but I really wish he was the kind to talk sweetly to me, approach me and hug, kiss, hold hands, etc. I also think it's good for our kids to see affection between the two of us so we role model a close relationship. Sometimes it feels like his feelings aren't there because he doesn't do those things, but then he is a good husband and father...very loyal and caring and giving. I would rather have a genuine man who wasn't all lovey-dovy, than the alternative.
    carol2m2

    Answer by carol2m2 at 11:30 AM on Sep. 25, 2010

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