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"hit back" theory - agree or disagree?

yesterday i posted about my friend telling her daughter to push mine back after mine pushed her, which she didn't anyway, they were swaying and bumped into eachother. my friend says she handles it this way so her child knows self defense. my child always comes to me and tells me when someone has hurt her or treated her unfairly, and usually everyone is happy with the outcome. after her child pushed mine back yesterday, everyone was upset. it didn't seem like a logical parenting move. not trying to start a fight here, just looking for honest opinions on the subject. do you or do you not teach your child to hit back, why or why not?


Asked by Anonymous at 1:00 PM on Sep. 25, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • In that paticular situation, no I do not agree. Because the kids were playing and accidentally bumped each other. So telling her daughter to hit yours does not make any sense what so ever. BUT, I do agree that if a child were to come up and actually physically attack my child, that he should defend himself. I dont think that he should allow anyone to hurt or bully him.

    Answer by xxMasonsMommaxx at 1:09 PM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • I also don't agree with her in that situation. Now at school that's a different story. My daughter was hit numerous times at school last year and the teachers would just tell my daughter to be quiet and the principal would shrug it off. Now, I tell my daughter if someone hits her at school to hit them back. She was being bullied by this girl at school at the beginning of school, that girl kicked my daughter and my daughter hit her. Needless to say that girl has stopped bothering my daughter.

    Answer by PoisonousBlonde at 1:24 PM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • i teach my kids not to hit any one or any thing because its just not the right thing to do.if my kids hit each other i do my best to stop it.

    Answer by ladybug36519 at 1:03 PM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • I've taught my kids that you don't ever hit another person, period.

    Answer by Scuba at 1:15 PM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • disagree im going to try to teach my son not to hit that its not right.

    Answer by HeatherMacon at 1:20 PM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • I disagree. Violences only breeds more violence.

    Answer by HotMama330 at 1:35 PM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • it does really depend...I def dont think she should have told her that in that situation. I do tell mine to hit back though, because I will not have them getting beat up and picked on. Kids are mean, and if they find someone that they can pick on and bully that wont do anything back, they will not stop. Also if 1 of mine hits, I will tell the other kid to hit back. It does them good to see how it feels to be hit, so they dont do it anymore. My children are not violent though, and this has only come up a few times.

    Answer by LuvMyMedic3ID at 1:39 PM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • I disagree.

    Answer by Fallaya at 1:40 PM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • I always told my kids do not hit but to defend their self never let someone hurt you

    Answer by LoVe4Free at 1:43 PM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • Your friend is wrong. I could see if your child were jumping on her child's head and being mean, but for her to tell her child to hit your child because she bumped into her child?! That's insane! I believe in self defense, but not in young children. They should come to an adult to help them settle it. (Although like poisonousblond said, I was bullied and tortured and the teachers and admin did nothing to help!) But I don't believe in hitting, two wrongs do not make a right.

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 2:32 PM on Sep. 25, 2010