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Raising pagan kids & moms raised pagan

No bashing PLEASE!


I was raised christan, and hated it. I always had a lot of guilt, and pressure, and left feeling empty from it and wondering if my family could "love jesus" and feel him in their hearts why didnt I? I felt bad for just not getting it, I looked at god as angry with me. Do you thing teaching your kids pagan belifs would have the same effects just because it is your religion? Do you think there will be a generation of pagan children who grow up and don't feel anything and convert to christianity like I did growing up christian?

Not trying to be rude or anything, I just didn't come from this side, I came from christianity and I'm just curious how children raised pagan feel when their older.

I don't want to tell my son certain things that he may feel nothing about later.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:00 PM on Sep. 25, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Answers (12)
  • I was raised in a strict Christan family as well. However where you felt guilt (as my sister did) I just felt anger. I felt as if something inside me knew it wasn't right and like I was being forced to live a lifestyle I didn't agree with or support. I was angry because the questions I had were not being answered, and the answers I had were labeled as evil or demonic.

    Now as a Parent, and a Pagan, I choose not to teach my children religion. Instead I prefer to simply expose them beliefs from many paths. I celebrate the "Holidays" with them, do crafts, tell them the myths as I would if I were raising them by my beliefs. And my DH does the same (he's Christian). However, we do not involve them in any religious activities like Church, rituals, prayer or the like. And we are doing our best to expose them to other paths as well.
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 4:19 PM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • You raise your child in your beliefs. That is how they learn. If you are worried about it then allow your family to teach him Christian Practices as well, or you do it when he is old enough to understand it is not what you believe but it is another option. If you teach what you practice and involve him your children in a loving non-pushy manner they will not feel pressured. There is no this is the one and only path. I am raising my children as Christians but I know their is a chance they may choose another path and though that would make me sad I would support them because they learn by doing. I want them to explore as older children adn teens to make sure they choose what is right for them. I of course pray every day that they choose what I believe is the right path. For you it is a different path you hope they will choose but I am sure you feel the same way...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:23 PM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • I think because of the way I was raised I see the great importance in finding one's own path. And I see the disadvantages and pain that forcing religion on to a child has... I see the anger, the guilt, and burden it puts on children and I don't think that's what a good parent does. To me, parenthood is a time to guide and support, not a time to rule or control.

    Spirituality and Religion are very personal, and if you don't have a personal connection to them it won't matter what you were taught, because your heart won't be in it. I prefer instead to allow my children to find their own paths and their own answers. If and when they have questions I will do my best to answer them and will give them my beliefs, but I will always encourage them to follow their own hearts and minds over taking what I or anyone else say as fact.
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 4:23 PM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • I was also raised Christian, and I hated it. I mean there was so much that just did not seem right, like if God really did care, then why are there children in third world countries dying. Why are there children born to alcoholic mothers who then turn around and beat them to death. I mean every time I left church I left with more questions than answers.

    Anywho, I also plan on doing what SabrinaMBowen is going to be doing. I have two ten month olds twins and a two year old and one on the way, and me and my husband have both agreed to let them decide which religion is right for them.
    mama408

    Answer by mama408 at 4:25 PM on Sep. 25, 2010

  • I also am showing my son different religions. He will be introduces into christianity by my family anyways, so might as well introduce him to several things. When he gets old enough, he will be discovering, reaserching, and deciding religion for himself utlimatley.
    Jacqui410

    Answer by Jacqui410 at 4:08 AM on Sep. 26, 2010

  • I think it's possible that some raised as Pagan may choose a different set of beliefs. I was raised as a strict fundamentalist Christian and I didn't have the emptiness some are describing here. I felt something and I took Him to be the God everyone was talking about. As I got older I saw where my beliefs and my God differed from the Christian God I was raised to believe in. Only at that point did He reveal himself to me and He is not the Christian God at all.

    But I intend to raise my dd's Pagan. I know they could choose a different religion when they get older. But I want to give them the tools to find the God who calls to their hearts. I want to give them the tools to live an examined life. I want to give them a rational and inquisitive mind. I want them to search their hearts and "Know thyself." I have far more hope in teaching them values and structure that will last a lifetime than in giving them a God to believe in.
    isabellalecour

    Answer by isabellalecour at 8:51 AM on Sep. 26, 2010

  • coming from a unitarian universalist perspective, i have discussed religion in sunday school with many children who were raised pagan. although most of them prefer the religion of their parents, i do know of one boy who has recently become very involved in christianity. however, knowing what i personally know about him and his family i believe that he is seeking out the guidance and rules that he lacked at home. i don't think it would be a fair statement to say christians or pagans are more or less strict than each other, but christianity has more rules in general and teenagers in particular seek out security (e.g. my daughter asking if she can go to a party but telling me she wants me to say no). my children will choose their own path, but i will make sure to instill in them the values of personal responsibility of my religion.
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 10:53 AM on Sep. 26, 2010

  • while i believe it is important to help my children understand the choices that are available to them, i also believe it is my right and responsibility as a parent bringing life into the world and the primary teacher of my children to teach them according to my beliefs. there is a big difference between teaching your child to have an open mind and teaching them NOTHING which allows anyone who would try to sway them the opportunity to force belief on my children that does not match my family values. be careful of being so tolerant that you do not give your child guidance in choosing and teach them the values that are important to you.
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 10:59 AM on Sep. 26, 2010

  • Sharing your beliefs--and why they are your beliefs--is different than indoctrinating a child into something they might not want. If he is unfulfilled later, teach him to research other belief systems to find one that is right for him. Answer questions he might have. But if he seems to want to participate in what mommy believes, let him. Just don't push it.
    witchqueen

    Answer by witchqueen at 11:12 AM on Sep. 26, 2010

  • That's why *most* of us Pagan parents aren't necessarily raising "Pagan children"...most of us are exposing them to many paths and letting them choose.

    MamaK88

    Answer by MamaK88 at 11:14 AM on Sep. 26, 2010

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