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what do you think is an appropriate age for teens to have sex?

My neighbor and I have been talking for the past 30 minuites about this question. Her child is 14 and wants to have sex, he talks to an older teen who is 15 and pressuring him to do so. I know many moms want to say wait until you get married, but in this day and age kids are WAY faster than we were! what do you think she sholud do?

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thedies

Asked by thedies at 2:27 PM on Oct. 21, 2008 in Teens (13-17)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (58)
  • she can't "do" anything really... if he wants sex, he will have sex. all she can really do is teach him how to be safe about it to avoid STDs and pregnancy.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:33 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • well IMO if your child is going to do it then theres not much you can do, but I would NEVER encourage it, and dont allow kids to be alone. My parents never talked to me about these kind of things and even if they had of I dont think it would have made a difference. I got pregnant when I was 18 and married when i was 18, and Im sure thats not what my parents had wanted but it was my husbands and my choice, me getting pregnant was no accident, it was planned and although my parents are happy for me and love my DD to death, Im sure they might have tried to talk me out of it If i had talked to them about it.
    chloe_romano

    Answer by chloe_romano at 2:33 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • I think 14 is waaaaaay too young, but unfortunately the 14 year old probably doesn't think so. I would have a long talk with my child about all the reasons to wait and potential complications from having sex (babies, STD's, emotional confusion and entanglements, etc etc) but would also make sure that my child knew where to acquire and how to use condoms in case they decided to go ahead with it any way.
    riotgrrl

    Answer by riotgrrl at 2:35 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • Meh...I lost my virginity when I was sixteen. I was in a committed relationship at the time, so it wasn't a casual encounter by any means. My mom made sure I was educated, I was on birth control, and she took me to the store and bought me a box of condoms. She was smart enough to know that if kids REALLY want to have sex, they're going to find a way to do it. You can't stop teenagers, no matter how much you want to. Even if you breathe down their necks and take them the school and pick them up, THEY WILL FIND A WAY.
    caitxrawks

    Answer by caitxrawks at 2:36 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • I was 16 and I had been thinking about having sex for like a year prior to loosing my virginity and I just wasnt ready so I waited... I have always been really mature for my age..... so when I was 16 and I had been in a realationship for quite some time I was sure that I was ready and I did it , I thought it out made sure we were safe but I felt ready and never had any regrets!! Thats what I hope for my daughters that hopefully they will be older than 14 and that they know all of the facts on saftey and that they are with someone they care about and feel 100% ready thats my hope!! Yes I would love to tell them wait til you fall in love and get married but its just not realaistic these days!!!
    scaredmommy08

    Answer by scaredmommy08 at 2:55 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • lock them in the room until they are 18!!

    ok just kidding... just be open with them and teach them about safe sex because if you dont they will do it behind your back and mostly likely unsafely. good luck
    saraelf

    Answer by saraelf at 2:56 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • 18
    mamakirs

    Answer by mamakirs at 3:02 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • I think 17 or 18. 14 is too young regardless of whether the child is a boy or girl. Becoming sexually active at 14 can lead to promiscuity or sex addiction. Besides he shouldn't be "pressured" into it by a 15 year old or anyone else. Talk to him about peer pressure. Make sure he knows how bad birth control is (89% effective for most methods) and how to use it. And btw it's great that he's talking to you about it.
    onethentwins

    Answer by onethentwins at 3:21 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • As long as they know how to use a condom and are being safe I don't think there can be an age limit. If they know about it, they're gonna do it! Yes it is appauling that 12 year olds are having sex, but what can you do except...try to be a little more strict with them. Make them leave the door open when they're in their rooms. IF they're "studying" tell them they can study in the dining room or living room. You just have to be strict sometimes and, yes, annoyingly in their business.
    Imogine

    Answer by Imogine at 3:34 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • 18. I was 18 when I lost mine, and got pregnant. BUT i'm married to my babys father. Honestly, because of my parents talking to me, all the time.(we were shown what can happen, and told the emotional part), which is what kept me from temptation . My parents would not allow us to be allow with the opposite sex, kepts us in activities, and basically made us respect them. To many people are saying well they'll do it anyway, YEA IF THEY ARE NOT AFRAID!.
    YanniSmoMMy

    Answer by YanniSmoMMy at 3:40 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

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