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I have been in a relationship for a little over a year. Yet we only see each other every other weekend, twice a month. He lives 20 minutes away, has been married, divorced for 4 years and has 2 children he sees the other weekend we are not together.
I do love him, however, I am frustrated that we dO not see each other a little bit more.

Am I wrong to want this? He seems content with the way things are. I have been told that since he was hurt, betayed by his ex, that I need to give him time.

I have been patient. He calls everyday, several times, I have met his family. And we are good together. We "get" each other.

Am I being irrational? Or what?


Asked by REN at 8:30 PM on Oct. 21, 2008 in Relationships

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This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • Don't break it off just yet. As others have said - talk to him. It does sound like you have a good relationship and get along nicely with his family. Chances are he is comfortable with the way things are and doesn't feel compelled to change it. I think he really cares for you or he wouldn't be calling you everyday. But you need to gently nudge him. Tell him how you are feeling but as amydh says, not through an ultimatum. I had a similar situation as you only I am with my daughter every other weekend. I told him that I was having a hard time feeling so fragmented in my life going back and forth. He just listened. Then 2 days later, he had a whole plan layed out. Wanted me to "live" with him on the days I didn't have my child. And we are working him into my life on the days I have my daughter. It just took asking and some patience. By the way, we'd been together 14 months when I asked him.

    Answer by kathyartist2007 at 12:20 AM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • If he's happy with it, then you need to decide if that's something you can live with. If not, then perhaps you need to move on. Everyone isn't always "at the same place" within a relationship.

    Answer by EireLass at 8:33 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • Could be time to ask him where he sees the relationship going...

    Answer by rhope4 at 8:33 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • My gut instinct is to tell ya that you are happy only because you see each other so in-frequently. LOL
    Sounds to me like ya need to ask him these questions! We cannot answer for him...only he can.
    Good luck ...hope you both can find a happier arrangement.

    Answer by MommasCooCoo at 8:36 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • He probaly doesn't want to get to serious with the relationship right now. He is enjoy himself as a free man. But you should let him now how you feel about him and see how he feels about you.

    Answer by moviestartaal at 8:47 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • I had said to him at one point how things seem to be going well with us, as an observational remark, and his reply was " do not rock the boat". How do I tak ethat?

    Answer by REN at 8:49 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • dump him he probably eatin his cake pie and va jay jay 2

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:51 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • And he knows that I love him. Although he does not like to hear me tell him and at least he is not pulling away as he did when I first told him how I felt 5 months ago. And I had only told him again when he and I went away for a weekend and we had a good time.

    Answer by REN at 8:52 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • I like timelines. Ask him where he sees your relationship in 2 yrs, 5 yrs, etc.

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:58 PM on Oct. 21, 2008

  • He is sending you gigantic blazing signals that he is not in any way, shape or form ready for a serious committment. If you can live with that for the time being, great. If you want more than he is willing to give right now, then you'd better break it off and go look for someone new.

    Answer by BlueFrogMama at 10:06 PM on Oct. 21, 2008