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How will I know if & when I will be ready for another child? adult content

Im 22 years old & have a 2.5 year old son. My husband and I have been together for 6 years, married 3. He wants another child, but Im not sure if I do. Alot of his family has been pressuring me to have another. Saying I need to have another soon because I shouldnt wait so long bc of what their age differences would be. My MIL has 2 daughters of her own but neither want children atm, so I guess thats why she wants me to have another so bad. She says she wants another grandbaby bc my son isnt a baby anymore.. Now personally, Im not even sure if I want another child. & If I do, I would rather wait until Im sure that I want another and go from there. But, how will I know if I truly want and am ready for another child? I kind of feel like I would like to try again in a few years for a girl, but then when I think about it Im not completely sure. Would you have another if your DH & his family wanted you to but you werent ready?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:47 PM on Sep. 27, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • This is a decision between you and your husband, not his family. Talk to your husband on how you feel and come to a compromise. Maybe instead of a few years you can try for a baby in a year and a half? That way he doesn't have to wait 3years and you don't have to have another child right now. Having children is a big decision so don't let his family rush you into something you aren't ready for. I'm pregnant with my 2nd child now and my son is 7yrs old and some say its a big age gap (and it is) but when this child is born it will be a lot easier to care for it seeing as how my son showers, feeds, cleans, and picks up after himself. Do what's best for you and YOUR family:) Good luck Mama!
    worriedmommy600

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 5:47 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • its your body . flat out. and while everyone can apply whatever pressure they want. you can smile and just tell them ALL IN GOOD TIME AND THE RIGHT TIME. having another child is a huge step when its a planned thing. you will know the time is right when its a balance between being emotionally ready , financially ready, etc. if you dont feel ready yet then DONT. a year is not going to hurt ANYTHING or anyone.
    BlacksheepSati

    Answer by BlacksheepSati at 1:51 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • You will know. you will be saying I want a baby and know you are ready. No I would not have a baby because of DH or others. I wanted a baby for a year before hubby did. WE just talked about it. He would let me know he was not ready. So I respected that but would keep talking about it. Finally one day he said I am ready too.
    Raeann11

    Answer by Raeann11 at 1:52 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • I too and 22...I have a son who just turned 5(he was planned!). My husband wanted another child...I wasnt so sure. We then went through some problems..I gave in..to make him happy..BAD REASON!

    GREAT RESULT!

    I now have a 3 week old son...I am extremely happy. I love my little man so much and am very excited to have two children!

    I dont think you should feel pressured by his family. Its wrong of them. Does your husband pressure you? He should tell his family to back off. I say wait...see how you feel in a year...I am glad there is a 5 year difference between my two...
    tiger_tatted1

    Answer by tiger_tatted1 at 2:03 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • I am not sure. I have one child. My dh and I just know our family is complete. We refuse to give into people telling us we need to have another child. WE look at this way: It is our financies, my body, our job to raise our son, etc. So if we are going to have another one or not, then it will our decision, no one elses.
    Mom2Just1

    Answer by Mom2Just1 at 4:28 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • As far as his family goes... they aren't the one raising the child. They don't get a choice, a voice, an opinion, etc.

    As for the husband... I would consider his feelings and think about being ready and what might help you to get to that point. Keep an open conversation and tell him about changes that you think need to happen. Be on the same page because this is your child, yours and his, and you both should be respected for where you are.
    tyheamma

    Answer by tyheamma at 5:33 PM on Sep. 27, 2010