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3 Bumps

custody battle....

So my ex was threatening to take my son and even ran off with him for as day when I told him I was moving out, he texted me earlier saying he wants to be civil and figure out a parenting plan... Our son is 15 months and I don't know what kind of plan to do.... I want my son 24/7 but I understand he needs time with his father and I would never take that away from him. Who has gone through this and how did you figure it out? I need advice because even though I need to leave it hurts and I'm scared... thanks!

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June_Mama09

Asked by June_Mama09 at 5:14 PM on Sep. 27, 2010 in Relationships

Level 26 (26,054 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Maybe every other weekend and 1-2 days out of the week for a few hours.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 5:18 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • the plan should be..if you can't be civil and come up with a plan on your own..you get your child until the court decides for you..that means don't let him see your child..period.
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 5:18 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • ..in other words, if he is making threats, cussing you, wanting to fight over who gets him..tell him to take a hike. You will let a judge decide when he can see his child
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 5:20 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • I let the state appoint our visitation plan.
    xxlilmomma09

    Answer by xxlilmomma09 at 5:21 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • If you were never married even if he did sign the birth certificate you have full custody and dont have to let him see your son. The law states that a child born out of wed lock custody is with the mother. However if you are married then i think you should let him see him every other weekend.
    AWebber212

    Answer by AWebber212 at 5:23 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • Hey! With your son being younger, I would suggest a rotating schedule every few days. If you are wanting 50/50, which IMO is best for every child in their parent's divorce, I would try 5/5/2/2, then later maybe switching to a week with you and a week with dad, so on and so on. For example, you would have Mon and Tues every week, Dad has Wed and Thurs with each having rotating weekends. If it is your weekend, you would have Fri-Tues, if its Dad's weekend he has Wed-Sun etc. You could also break up the week, like Mon and Thurs are your days, Dad gets Tues/Wed or reverse and rotate weekends. There are a lot of options, gotta pick whats best for the 3 of you. Best advice I can give is to work together and be civil..it can be easier on your son with both parents getting along and looking out for his best interest. Good luck!
    2010Mommy2be

    Answer by 2010Mommy2be at 5:23 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • The 'standard' plan in my area is every other weekend (Friday evening to Sunday evening) and 1 to 2 days during the week for a few hours that day.
    Then there is the holiday splits. The "Standard" in my area is- Christmas day gets split Noon Christmas Eve to Noon Christmas Day. Then Noon Christmas Day to Noon on the 26th--you alternate this way over the years. Then other holidays alternate years, so one gets Thanksgiving one year and the other gets it the next, etc. The same for the other holidays.

    Other areas may have different standards, but this is they most courts divide things where I am from.
    layh41407

    Answer by layh41407 at 5:26 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • If he was threatening you Id let a judge decide.You dont want him to be nice just to take your baby.
    mandynjohnsmom

    Answer by mandynjohnsmom at 6:33 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • The court made me let my ex get my girls every other weekend from Friday afternoon til Sunday afternoon and we had to meet in the middle, no matter where we lived in the state.
    mommaof3girls24

    Answer by mommaof3girls24 at 8:03 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

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