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How awful is it....

That my husband and I are 24 and 26 with a two and a half year old and are not planning on having any more kids for awhile. We were lucky to have our daughter. Most kids our age have 2 or 3. They are planning their next one and they look at us funny b/c neither one of us want one right now. The thing is I was so focused on having a baby before and not my career. Now it's the other way around. i don't want another one until my career gets off the ground alittle better. Is that so awful to not want any more kids for a selfish reason like my job?

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Asked by alaskaice at 11:53 PM on Oct. 21, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (7)
  • No, it's not selfish at all. Go for it! You will have something to fall back on when your child/children are grown. Trust me, I don't have a career and now my kids are 14 & 16. I had my kids less than two years apart and have never really been able to get a career going because daycare costs were outrages even back over ten years ago. Take it from someone who wishes I could have done it and now I am trying to get one at my age. Not easy...


    Answer by Cindrella72 at 12:13 AM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • My kids are 7 years apart because I wanted to get my career going and provide a life for my family. People who just make babies with no solid financial foundation are irresponsible. Sounds like you and your dh are being smart and planning ahead. There is plenty of time to make babies.

    Answer by cdgoldilocks at 1:05 AM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • definitely are doing things great...very responsible...

    Answer by Killemo at 2:04 AM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • not awful at all. I had my kids 6 years apasrt because after my daughter I wanted to focus on my career. It's not selfish to want to be able to provide for your kids.

    Answer by ny.chica at 2:22 AM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • As long as you are taking care of the kids you have now, and taking care to NOT have kids that you DON'T want, then I don't think it's anyone else's business WHY you choose to have (or not have) the number you want.

    I say, to each their own, and as long as you and your dh are ok with it, tell everyone else that until they pay your bills and / or are invited into your bed, or become your OB/GYN, your reproductive choices aren't any of their business!

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 2:23 AM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • Why do we worry so much about what others think? They don't pay the bills or provide for your family's needs. You have plenty of time. I wasn't even thinking about kidsat 24. I had m first just after I turned 30 and that was perfect timing. Do things your way.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:50 AM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • i'm 30 and only have 2 SS... no Bio kids yet... i've been a career minded girl- until lately... don't feel pressure by the world to run your life.

    Answer by alwms at 7:05 AM on Oct. 22, 2008

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