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how old was your child when they had their first sleepover with a friend from school, who you guys didnt know before-hand

dd is in grade 1..last year we never had any play dates, she only got invited to 1 bday party..this year school has been in session for 3 weeks..and 1 of her friends fom last year isnt in the same class as her..so they have had 2 playdates so far, now tonight she called and asked her for a sleepover at her house this weekend..i know her mom, we've talked a few times, but nothing much really..they live about a 5 minute walk from my house, i know i cant ask you guys if you think its ok..cuz you dont know them at all...but do you think its to soon for a sleepover?? or am i over thinking it? at the same time, i dont wanna say no, and then ruin their "friendship" ya know?? i want her to have friends..and be able to have sleepovers, but at the same time they played at school EVERY DAY last year...so what was your first time like? how long did the kids know each other for? and what about you and the parents, did you talk lots?

 
alexis_06

Asked by alexis_06 at 10:40 PM on Sep. 27, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 42 (146,031 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • I wouldn't let her. I let my 5-yr-old have sleepovers all the time, but the girls have been best friends since the day they were born and the other girl's mom and I have been working together or 9 years and been best friends for 7 years. I wouldn't let her sleep over anybody else's house if I didn't know the parents well.

    I would politely say I am not comfortable with sleepovers yet, but the other girl can sleep over to your house any time (if you would like that).
    mygirlpaige

    Answer by mygirlpaige at 10:44 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • My 4th grader still has not had a sleep over. I am just so scared to death to let her go, lol. I know I need to at some point but she is my oldest and she is just growing up way to fast.

    I don't think you are over reacting at all.
    itsallabtthem84

    Answer by itsallabtthem84 at 10:42 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • I am very overprotective of my son. His first sleepover was the end of second grade and I'd met the other kid's mom all year through classroom activities and such. Just like with your situation, the boy and his family only lived five minutes away. It was hard for me to let go, but I think in the end it was beneficial to my son. As an only child, he craves play dates and interaction with children his own age. He was barely eight years old when he had his first sleep over.
    I drove him there, gave the mom a list of phone numbers, talked to her and her husband for a while and even then it was hard for me to walk away. I stayed by the phone the rest of the afternoon and picked him up before lunch the next day. This growing up and letting go thing is so difficult. Good luck though, whatever your decision is!
    zava_t

    Answer by zava_t at 10:44 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • My kids are 4 & 6 and don't sleep over at friends' tho they have at my mother in laws' before.
    txdaniella

    Answer by txdaniella at 10:49 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • I have always made it a point to meet the childs parents, in their home. When our youngest had a friend that wanted him to come over and play, I took him, met the Mom, saw the home they lived in, and then made my decision right then that he would NOT be sleeping there. I let him stay and play for a little while, but then picked him up, a couple hours later. I also let the little boy sleep over here, but their home was so dirty, and cluttered that I just couldn't let him stay over night. I politely said " we have some evening plans and we can have his little friend over anytime... Meeting the parents and seeing their home first is a must with us...
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 10:51 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • Won't happen!
    bookworm23

    Answer by bookworm23 at 10:57 PM on Sep. 27, 2010

  • My dd6 1st grader and no I would not let her go because she's my baby. lol One day I know but not yet. So yea its way too early for sleep overs with friends. Suggest a camping day or something where she stays over till nighttime with you present. That's what I do so my dd dont feels left out.
    mekarevell

    Answer by mekarevell at 11:03 PM on Sep. 27, 2010