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2 Bumps

What should I say to my grandmother-in-law who is offending me?

When my husband and I found out that we are pregnant I didn't want to tell anyone the name we picked because I didn't want to hear anyone's negative comments and I figured that once the baby was born no one would vocalize their negative comments to us. I couldn't keep it in though, so we told people and for the most part everyone told us how much they love the name, but my husband told me the other day that his (step)grandma expressed to him how she doesn't like the nickname we picked. My husband told her not to tell me because he knew how I would feel about it. But now she is specifically calling her a different nickname in posts on facebook. I feel that she should just call her by her given name then if she doesn't like our nickname. Is it wrong that I'm offended that she seems to be going out of her way to call her by anything other than the name/nickname we picked? And it's not even that I hate the nickname she uses...

 
MamaSarah1104

Asked by MamaSarah1104 at 2:35 PM on Sep. 28, 2010 in Baby Names

Level 18 (5,797 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (23)
  • If she is just trying to spite you.....let her be. She can call her whatever she likes but let it be known to her that when she is around your child she is to be called by a specific name and nothing else.
    hellraiser2010

    Answer by hellraiser2010 at 2:57 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • Ignore her. My cousin and her husband named their son Ender after a Sci-fi book hero. In the book Ender's real name was Andrew so my Aunt and Uncle insisted on calling him Andrew. Everyone else called him Ender so eventually they came around.


    Plus, you know even though you're offended and it does seems deliberate, Grand parents often have special nicknames for their grand children; tiger, princess etc., and vice versa. 


    What's the name?

    onethentwins

    Answer by onethentwins at 2:41 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • You just can't make everyone happy! Choosing a name is hard enough don't worry about what others think! My best friend told me nearly everyday how much she hated the name we choose for our son, great I would tell her don't name your son Jackson! My grandmother hates it as well refuses to call him Jackson when she heard me call Jackson Jack she said "Oh thank god Jack is a lot better!" It bothered me at first but now I just don't care my husband and I love his name and aside from Jackson himself no one else's opinion matters!
    mum2Jack23

    Answer by mum2Jack23 at 3:05 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • It's your child, there's nothing she can do about the name, so don't worry about her. My MIL doesn't like her great-grandson's name, but she has learned to accept it and of course she adores him. Your GIL will eventually learn to accept it too. She may not fall head over heels in love with it, but once she realizes that complaining about it isn't going to make you change it, she'll learn to deal.
    thatgirl70

    Answer by thatgirl70 at 3:10 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • My son is almost 5 months. His name is Nathaniel. Nathan for short. me and my girl all call him buddy. have since he was born. my mom and dad and brother call him junior. but it doesnt bother me. people like to make up their own nicknames all the time. shouldnt let it get to you. she'll have a special name from yall and then a special name from the grandmother as well. she'll probably like that when she gets older. and will make her feel special
    jbond83

    Answer by jbond83 at 9:41 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • It's really not that big of a deal, it's just a nickname. It's not like it's her actual real name. My daughter's nickname is Abby, but my aunt used to call her Gabby instead. I had no problem with that.
    poptart0325

    Answer by poptart0325 at 10:35 AM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • I think you should let it go, especially if she hasn't brought it up to you.

    What does it hurt for her to feel like she's got a special name for her grandchild? Do you think it would bother your child? If not, i'd move on.
    UpSheRises

    Answer by UpSheRises at 2:38 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • Just deal with it. It's really not a big deal if she has her own special nick name.
    mompam

    Answer by mompam at 2:38 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • Let it go. Every family member of mine has a different nickname for my son. They adore and love him and it doesn't bother him. If your child is hurt or offended by the name you should put your foot down. Otherwise why cause any unnecessary drama?
    chrstn_rm

    Answer by chrstn_rm at 2:41 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • Before the baby comes this seems like a huge deal, but once the baby gets here it will likely be a blip on your radar. Maybe the baby comes and Gma comes around to Lottie once everyone else does. Maybe not. Maybe the baby comes and you all end up calling her Noodle Bug or something totally crazy. What will matter is that she is referred to lovingly by her family. I once babysat a kid named Hunter but everyone called him Bean so much so that he thought that was his actual name for the first few years of his life. You've picked what you like and you will call her that and most people will get on board once she's here. Try not to worry about the others, you have enough on your plate and you can't really do anything to change Gma.
    MaryMW

    Answer by MaryMW at 2:53 PM on Sep. 28, 2010