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I can't get any help from the father.

Help me I am reasy to put my child out off the house because of his disrepect towards me and I have tried everything. I went to a Musical last night and he left the house, and come back knocking on my other sons window to get in when he has a key, broke the screen and came home high. I am at the end of my rope and I need prayer and help. He is 15 years old and consatly lies. My mother-in-law always call and acts concerned but always says _____ has no where to put them and he don't work and he is saved now and you have to pray, etc. I need a brake I have our divorce papers and for the last 8 years he has done nothing for our children at all te thinks calling does something . They say whatever on the phone but as soon as they get off it is another story. Help please.....

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ADREAM

Asked by ADREAM at 12:55 PM on Oct. 22, 2008 in Teens (13-17)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • I think that putting your son out of the house at this young of an age would be a mistake. I understand that you're at your wit's end, but he needs you more right now than ever--- especially if the father is of no help. I'd say ground him indefinitely. I don't mean "okay, son, no tv, no friends, no going anywhere." I mean all of those things and beyond. If he isn't trustworthy to be left alone at home, take him with you. Make him go grocery shopping with you, to the beauty salon to get your hair done, whatever it is, drag him along. Make his life feel like prison (no privileges whatsoever), but still let him know that he's loved. Never make him think you aren't supportive of him. When both of you are calm & collective, have a long heart-to-heart with him. Good luck!
    heather.huckaby

    Answer by heather.huckaby at 3:24 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • I'll pray for you. See if you can afford and if there is a Young Marine's boot camp. :)

    Punish him by taking his beloved Items until he changes his attitude and character.
    JCRestoredme

    Answer by JCRestoredme at 4:15 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • Check this site out.

    http://www.lemanbooksandvideos.com
    JCRestoredme

    Answer by JCRestoredme at 4:19 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • I have been exactly where you are with my oldest son. At 15 you cannot legally put him out of the house. If he comes home high again you can call the police and have him arrested, you can force him into an inpatient drug rehab (that's what I did and they also councel the kids) or you can put him in boot camp. A lot of people might disagree with me but if you have tried everything else and it's not working then sometimes this is what it takes. He will be pissed off but you keep telling him that if you didn't love him you wouldn't care what he did. It will take time but things will get better.
    sammiesmom2000

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 9:33 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • Did you know you can talk to your local police officers, and they can well somewhat scar" your child.

    My parents did that to me when I came home around 1 am every night. It does work when they start talking about JJ and JJ AEP.
    shadysyrup313

    Answer by shadysyrup313 at 12:50 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • My (now 36 yo) son was one of those who thought he knew it all and mom was too dumb to know anything...When he broke the law I got the police involved, even though it broke my heart to do so, and when he broke the terms of his probation, I locked him out of the house and called the police to come and get him....you have to be tough, because if you let him get away with things now, he will never learn....the best rule of thumb to use is: what would you do if he was not your child, would you let a stranger treat you the way he is treating you?....No you would not, so just because he is your son he doesn't have the right to break the rules and laws....A juvenile record is sealed....an adult record is forever.....Good luck...pm me anytime if you think I can help...Marty
    malam

    Answer by malam at 5:23 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • I really feel for you.I have 2 sons 9 & 15.Neither father helps support their child.My oldest son stays a week with me & a week with his father.When he comes home,i have a rough time with him.He has always been a weet,good,quiet kid,until this year and he thinks he can do whatever he wants to do.I have raised him by myself since he was 2.But now that he gets to spend time with his dad,he's disrespectful to me.I'm at a loss also as to what to do.It's always just been me and him til my second child came along.I had 2 relationships that lasted atleast 6 years(each).2 sons with 2 daddy's.My 9 year olds dad,will come get him if my son calls,but my son has to call him.My son will not stay overnight,but he wants to go on Sunday and stay from 9 til5,no later.If anyone has advice please help.And i really understand what you're going through and i will pray for you and your son.Pray for me 2.I'm sorry.
    cherrybomb814

    Answer by cherrybomb814 at 11:07 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • My husband told our son that if he ever decided to meet the wrong friends that are into illegal drugs or are in gangs! That he would have our son sent to Military school! But you have the option to either punish your son by taking all of his stuff preliveges away! And also make him do really hard chores at home! Or! Have your dad or brother if they live close to you make your son do chores for them and let them know what kind of trouble your son is in! You can also! take his car keys away too! You can also let your husband or exhusband know excatly what your sons up too! And talk to your sons dad and let him know that if his son does not straigten out! That you will ship him off to military school! Good luck!
    iamjenny1957

    Answer by iamjenny1957 at 11:50 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • Since your sons dad isn't willing to help you out with any support at all! I would suggest having a police officer scare your son straigt! If that doesn't work! Than it's time to send him off to military school! good luck!
    iamjenny1957

    Answer by iamjenny1957 at 11:55 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • IF U BELIEVE IN GOD, U PRAY HARD , TO GIVE U STRENGHT AND TO GUIDE U THE RIGHTWAY TO DILL WITH THIS PROBLEM WITH UR KID! TOUGHT LOVE IS THE BEST!
    yoyo77

    Answer by yoyo77 at 6:43 PM on Oct. 23, 2008

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