Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

5 Bumps

I need your ladies encouragement...

I don't know if you read my last post but I am leaving my abusive SO.... He is trying to "take" me out and is being super nice.... I know this is prob another way to controll me but I still love him, so I really need assurance.... thanks!

Answer Question

Asked by June_Mama09 at 5:57 PM on Sep. 28, 2010 in Relationships

Level 26 (26,054 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • Hon stay strong..GET OUT! I was in an abusive relationship and boy am I glad to get out of it. Trust me you can do MUCH better

    Answer by WranglerMommy at 5:58 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • Girl get your butt away from him. You deserve so much better... I know you love him but there is someone out there waiting for you who will treat you RIGHT... THEN you'll REALLY know what love is. Good luck mama... (((hugs)))

    Answer by MamaLisa1976 at 5:59 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • you have strength, you just need to use it, OP. maybe a separation is what's needed, for both of you to realize the negatives in the relationship and work to fix them. there's nothing wrong with taking time apart. just don't find 'comfort' somewhere will be tainted, and not what you need at this time. you need to be with you.
    good luck!

    Answer by dullscissors at 5:59 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • google a diagram of the "cycle of abuse"
    this is just part of it
    I worked for center against domestic violence
    get away as soon as you can!!!
    good luck.

    Answer by gottalovemal at 6:05 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • can do it.We don't need a man in our life to make us happy.we don't need a man in our life to " complete us ".You need to get out as soon as you can before he changes your mind.I'm sure you know the abusive cycle.If you don't do it now,there is a good chance you won't do it until the next time he decides to be abusive.If you don't have family that will help you,go to a Domestic Violence shelter.They will help you.But once you do get away,the hard part is staying away.I know in my heart that you can do this.We are strong women.Please take care mama.And be brave little warrior!!!

    Answer by bvannkissy at 6:10 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • Stay strong! They are always "sorry", but he will do it again. You deserve better!!

    Answer by toobigfrogs at 6:13 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • Please stay strong. He knows you love him. He wants you to focus on that instead of doing what is best for you so he is making one grand gesture. Is it safe to say you have tried to leave before and he magically became the perfect husband for a day? He will be just good enough just often enough to keep you. It's more of a possession thing than a love thing for him. You have to remember how he is on a daily basis, not those few grand gesture times. You deserve better.

    Answer by at 6:20 PM on Sep. 28, 2010


    That is what they do, they are abusive until you decide to leave and then they will be nice again and then slowly crep back into being abusive again. Please leave for yourself and your children. Big Hugs! You can do it ♥


    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 6:21 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • Stay Strong mama!!! you can do it!!! don't fall back into the cycle!!!

    Answer by EttaMay at 6:25 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • Do what you feel is right but honestly you should get out of that relationship before you end up badly hurt. Dont fall for his tricks men do that i have had it happen before i was in a verbally abusive relationship told him i was leaving him then he started to be nice thought he was going to change and when i decided to stay with him he started doing it over again. Dont let him trick you hun.

    Answer by Stowell09 at 6:33 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.