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2 Bumps

If your adult child tells you something disturbing in confidence and says don't tell anyone

anyone, would you keep this information to yourself, or share it with your husband?

 
Rnurse

Asked by Rnurse at 8:34 PM on Sep. 28, 2010 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 23 (17,537 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (27)
  • My children will be well aware that what you tell one parent will most definitely go to the other. That's the way I was raised as well, you just knew. That said, it would depend on the information and based on that I would have to decided what to do. Like someone else said, is it illegal, is it dangerous, is it harmful?
    emilex

    Answer by emilex at 10:16 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • It depends, normally I wouldn't tell but if it is something that might cause harm in any way, I would.
    older

    Answer by older at 8:35 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • Keep it. Children tell mom different stuff than they tell dad.
    ecodani

    Answer by ecodani at 8:36 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • It depends. Would it make the situation better or worse for your child?
    karamille

    Answer by karamille at 8:36 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • Is it illegal? Does it endanger their life or someone elses? If the answer is no...then no, you don't share it. If you do that 'child' will likely never confide in you again. It will probably change your relationship forever if you break the confidence without protecting someone else.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 8:37 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • If it was going to harm them in some way..YES. If it was just something embarrassing or secret for some other reason...then no..you want to keep the confidence in your relationship as much as you can...

    But remember you are STILL the parent...if action must be taken ...then it must!
    mom2twobabes

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 8:40 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • i will keep it unless they tell me its ok to tell my husband...but i would always ask 1st...dont ever want to lose my kids trust
    iNk-FrEaK

    Answer by iNk-FrEaK at 8:40 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • Depends on what it is. If it involves any issues of personal safety or health I would flat out tell them I couldn't keep that private.
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 8:58 PM on Sep. 28, 2010

  • it would depend on what it is honestly.

    why doesn't she want to share it with others? Is it illegal or something that could be harmful to her? Then I might share it. If it's something more embarrassing, perhaps something that went wrong with her and an SO in an intimate situation, then it's not something that's going to affect anyone else, so I would keep it to myself.
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 12:19 AM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • When someone says I can't tell anyone, I always tell them not to tell me. I can not promise I won't spread the word unless I know what it is. However I tell my hubby everything and would even if I told them I wouldn't tell anyone.
    mom2queenie2004

    Answer by mom2queenie2004 at 3:57 PM on Sep. 29, 2010