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this is just getting out of control! I need a lot of help!

I am divorced. I have a daughter who is almost 2 and a half. She has been acting out lately- BAD! She lives with me & my BF, who I have been with for almost a year. She has always liked him & I do not believe her behavior has anything to do with him. When she gets upset she does one of a few things- or sometimes a combination of these things! She will scream, cry, whine. All of which I can handle, its not a big deal. What I DO have a problem with is when she hits or kicks! I am not much of a spanker, I could probably count on one hand how many times she has ever been spanked. The other thing that I hate is when she is in trouble or does not want to do what I say, then she will ask for her bio dad. I hate that! I do not want her to ask to go live with him when she is 12 cuz she does not want to follow the rules! How do I stop the hitting/kicking. And how do I get her to stop asking for her dad? (she sees him every other wkd)

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:17 AM on Sep. 29, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (6)
  • Sounds like she's acting out because she misses daddy. The acting out is not ok but she probably does need to see her dad more. try rewarding her GOOD behavior with seeing her dad. Make sure she understands. At that age kids respond better to rewarding the good and not so much with punishment. Trust me. I have a 2 and a half and almost 6 year old.

    Answer by SweetLoveofMine at 2:22 AM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • OP here- her father really does not really want to see her any more than that- add that to the fact that he is military & often gone for weeks/months at a time. I do tell her when I am proud of her for doing the right thing and I try not to get too worked up when she is misbehaving but the hitting has GOT to stop!

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:24 AM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • My DD is 2 1/2 yrs old also and her hitting and her mouth is the issues we are having with her. She will hit and kick when she doesn't get her own way and I spanking momma i just can't bring myself to spank her when I am trying to her not to hit. I use time-out and i take stuff away very often. Some days are better then others but latly she has really been having her days and it has nothing to do with not seeing someone or what not she is testing her limits and so is your LO they want to see how far they can get before they get a reaction out of us. I have learned to pick my battles with her cause i can't control everything. Good Luck momma I hope thingsget better.

    Answer by raemommy at 2:44 AM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • she just two i can understand that but at 2 she just does not understand ,the best way is take one toys away ,or ever time she hits cry she might think oh no i hurt mommy ,and no child wants to hurt their mom , she will feel bad

    Answer by dutchcanadain at 2:55 AM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • First of all...she is probably in her terrible 2s....normal for all kids that age. Do not worry to much about what her dissition will be when she is 12...that is a long time away from now. Also, its normal for kids to ask for the other parent if this one does not give them what they want. I always ignored the wining of my son when he was that age...the more attention you give them the longer they continue. The kicking is not nice....i would just go down on her eye level and tell her that this is not ok....tell her to stop it or she will be punished. You have to think of a punishment before you actually try to inforce it. Make sure you stick to your word and do punish her when she kicks again. only this way she will know you mean it....Good luck and don't worry too much about it...that is how kids are and some adults :)

    Answer by Ladyblue38 at 11:45 AM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • My ds is 3 and I've been having a similar problem him. He screams, throws himself on the ground and has started to kick, hit and spit! And it's usually when he hears the word no. I ignore his attempts to hit and kick. If he hits me I pick him up and put him in the corner, but I don't engage him. If he rolls around and screams I don't look at him. It hasn't stopped the behavior, but it has slowed it down.

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 10:05 PM on Oct. 1, 2010

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