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i dont know what to tell her

my sister is 15 and got dumped by her boyfriend after having sex with him . she was a virgin and she swearrs it was only once and she used a condom . but i told her to not let him talk her in to it cause boys that age do . i should know it happened to me at 17 . i want to make her feel better but i dont know how to do it with out it sounding like i told you so . i mean i wish she would had listened to me learn from my mistakes lol i thought thats what big sisters where for . any ideas ???

 
iloveyall2008

Asked by iloveyall2008 at 7:15 PM on Oct. 22, 2008 in Teens (13-17)

Level 1 (3 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • Yeah, mine was special too.
    I agree, tell her you will be there for her when she wants to talk. I think she learned her own lesson so no need to rub it in her face.
    LovinEveryDay

    Answer by LovinEveryDay at 7:22 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • i told my lil sis to get up and move on, it's not the end of the world, it was just virginity, he didn't break her arm.
    chyna_doll

    Answer by chyna_doll at 7:17 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • just let her know you are there for her when she wants to talk. she might not. when or if she does. just listen.
    KristaRene

    Answer by KristaRene at 7:17 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • thats rude. virginity is special. it was to me, and i am sure it still is to some girls out there.

    KristaRene

    Answer by KristaRene at 7:18 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • Hindsight is ALWAYS 20/20....we all wish we could tell people our mistakes and they learn from it without being hurt, but rarely does that happen. Just be there for her. Hang out with her, go shopping together, go see a movie, do girly things :)
    prettyrayray

    Answer by prettyrayray at 7:21 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • ya i agree it is rude my sister made a promise to her self to stay that way til marriage and she leet a biy talk her in to it .. anyways yes she has talked to me even tho we dont live with each otherr anymore and shes in minnesote with our mo and im in vegas with my SO she still comes to me with everything i know things mom will never know or anyone else for that she tells me everything thats why i belive she was at least safe about it
    iloveyall2008

    Answer by iloveyall2008 at 7:21 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • i dotn mean to and i dont want it to sound that way either by accident you know ...
    oh and she isnt upset about the boy shes upset about loseing her virginity she said dj the boy can kiss her a$$ that she desrves better at least she got that from me she bounces back pretty good and fast lol
    iloveyall2008

    Answer by iloveyall2008 at 7:24 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • I would explain to her that your there to listen, and not to let it get her down that bad. She can still renew herself. Just because she's had sex with one guy, one time doesn't make her a bad person, but she needs to learn from that mistake. Two of my friends were in the same position, but one of my friends felt so bad about losing her virginity that she felt sex was no longer special and she slept with 16 people in the course of 2.5 to 3 years of losing her virginity, my other friend realized it was a big mistake and only she could control weather it happened again, and it hasn't. Just let her know that you understand how she feels, and that she can't go back and change the past, but she's the only one who controls her future. And good luck.
    FinleyFirst

    Answer by FinleyFirst at 7:28 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • You don't have to say anything. She knows what she's feeling and she doesn't want to hear she made a mistake. Just hug her alot and listen. Just let her talk and pour it out. She'll appreciate it so much, and she will come to you again with issues. She'll know to trust you as her big sister.
    EireLass

    Answer by EireLass at 7:32 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

  • No, i'm not rude, i just don't' give pity parties. My sister was fine with what i told her, we both had the same experience losing ours and both heard the same thing. We got over and and realized it's not that important.
    chyna_doll

    Answer by chyna_doll at 7:42 PM on Oct. 22, 2008

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