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Have you ever been.... (TMI) adult content

molested in any way?
mentally
sexually
verbally
or beaten?
Dose it effect you today?
I have been through it all and I am so mentally unstable sometimes I fear my own thoughts. I am seeing a counselor and on five medications for my "insanity"
Do you ever feel sorry for yourself?
Or do you think I should get over it and act like a big girl?

 
agriffinmom4

Asked by agriffinmom4 at 2:43 PM on Sep. 29, 2010 in Health

Level 18 (4,874 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • i was raped at 12 by a family friend. it has made me stronger and i know that it does not define who i am. i have moved on and forgiven him and hope he gets the help he needs (doubtful in our justice sysytem). eventually you will pull through this. you will be stronger and a more defined person with a strong sence of self. noone develops their strength by having it easy. good luck with everything!
    jennifer588

    Answer by jennifer588 at 3:21 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • The forgiveness of other is what helps you get over your "issues" with it. Once you have forgiven your offender you don't feel sorry for yourself and you don't hold that buden anymore. Anger and hate hurt you WAY more than it will hurt the person that hurt you. Once you get over it and forgive, you will feel accomplished and like a big girl.
    bjojola

    Answer by bjojola at 2:45 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • I was molested by a family friend when I was about 5 (not raped, thankfully). And my ex-husband (we were married 8 years) was extremely verbally abusive. I don't think it has affected me at all though. Even at 5, I knew it was a reflection on HIM, HE was the sick one, not me. And during my marriage, I knew I wasn't to blame either. My ex-husband was an alcoholic, and messed up in many, many ways. My old boss actually made me go to an Al-Anon meeting, and I hated it. All those people somehow blaming themselves, it made no sense to me.

    So yeah, for me, that was just something that made me go "shit happens, some people are assholes", and that's about it. I know I'm unusual in that though. Maybe that's why my SO calls me a robot sometimes, I'm really not an emotional person at all, heh.
    Anouck

    Answer by Anouck at 2:57 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • Molested? No. Raped and Beaten? Yes. Mentally & Emotionally abused? Yes, welcome to my childhood...

    And no, I don't feel sorry for myself, if anything I'm thankful for everything that happened to me. It made me stronger. It gave me the strength to stand up for what I believe in today and become my own person... I think each of us has to make our own future, and when you are ready, you will too...
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 2:47 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • What happened to you is not your fault. It could take sometime to get over what has happened to you. Nobody deserves this. I hope within time you can heal, but know that nobody can ever hurt you again. I am so sorry for the person that did this to you. You are a strong person because you are moving on with your life and can help somebody else survive this as well. "HUGS".
    sta517

    Answer by sta517 at 2:49 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • ever these things as a child
    or
    ever?

    my ex husband was abusive, i was in my 30's
    ----------
    do not feel sorry for myself, feel like i want to throw up (nerves, difficult time lately)
    act like a big girl, no, i am an adult so not a big girl, i act like an adult, sometimes a silly adult-maybe that is like a girl-the silly part
    no meds for me, but would do that if that was me, not needed and not addicted to, so no meds
    once i am moved, i would like to have a couple of glasses of red wine-sounds good, new place, red wine, better get more packing done, too many breaks on here, takes mind off crap in my cereal
    fiatpax

    Answer by fiatpax at 2:49 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • Agriffinmom4, first off I believe what happened to you is MUCH worse than what happened to me.... And I'm sorry you had to go through that. Second, I think everybody is different in how they process things. Suppression is bad. If your experiences are holding you back in any way, you SHOULD deal with them, so you can move on with your life. Me, I'm just wired differently. I'm logical to a fault. I didn't suppress my memories, and in fact I have no problems whatsoever remembering them or talking about them. I just never took them personally, if that makes any sense. I think therapy is a great tool in helping people get past bad experiences in life, I just know it doesn't work on somebody like me...
    Anouck

    Answer by Anouck at 3:06 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • Well it was not only one person it started when my cousin raped me when I was 12. then cause i was lost from that his friends did it too. I was taken advantage of cause i cared no more by many "men" and I met my now ex who was abusive to me in all ways. I left him after I found out he was with another woman. Then I got abducted by a man who forced me to sell my body for his benefit he was very abusive as well. Then I met my husband who got me a way from him. After I got away I was assaulted by a man who shoved his whole fist in me.... this has all been in the last12-13 years and I am working on trying to get over it but the most recent stuff has happened in the last three years
    agriffinmom4

    Comment by agriffinmom4 (original poster) at 2:53 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • Anouck.... I have done this for the most part however when MI started to talk about it to my counselor she really made me think about it. Most of my memories are suppressed but are now surfacing and that is what is bothering me she said they are resurfacing cause I have to deal with it so I can move on but honestly I don't want to remember it at all cause I forgot it for a reason right?
    agriffinmom4

    Comment by agriffinmom4 (original poster) at 3:02 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

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