Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

spoiled for christmas

My dd is an only child. She gets way too many gifts for christmas. She is 8 and I worry about downsizing and her waking up disappointed. I know I shouldnt have gotten her so much over the years but I LOVE Christmas!! Should I just keep it up so she can wake up to a huge pile of should I make a 10 gift rule and tell her in advance that this yar will be smaller? She doesnt act like a soiled brat, its just that I've set up an expectation and christmas is always huge. Im questioning if that is a good idea and I should wean her down or just enjoy it and who cares? I never buy on credit so financially it isnt a problem and I dont buy her much throughout the year. She is only christmas spoiled!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:53 PM on Sep. 29, 2010 in Holidays

Answers (14)
  • I say give her the Christmas you want to. Spoil away!

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 2:55 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • We also do alot for needy at Christmas time and are active in church so she knows it isnt all about the gifts. Its the size of the pile that concerns me..I told her where she used to get 10 gifts for $100 as she gets older the gifts are more expensive so the pile is smaller.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:55 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • It doesn't sound like she is "spoiled". If you can afford it and it's fun then go for it.


    Answer by Gailll at 2:57 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • We always had huge Christmases like that too growing up. We have continued the tradition with our own kids. I have realized though that by February I have donated or thrown away 1/2 of the toys. In fact my oldest son has gifts that he unwrapped a couple years ago but has never opened. So I am trying to downsize - we did downsize last year a bit and the kids were still happy with what they got. One way to make Christmas morning last longer with less gifts is to open half of them then stop and have breakfast then continue with the rest.

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 2:58 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • Maybe "adopt a child" at Christmas - needy children ususally in group homes have christmas list - tell your DD that some of the $$ is going to buy gifts for a child (maybe a girl her age) that would be getting nothing. She is old enough to understand the joy of Christmas is in the giving not the getting.

    Just a thought.

    Answer by chefronswife at 2:59 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • Is she truly enjoying everything she gets? The number of gifts could very well get overwhelming to a child. But if you have a set price limit and you dont go over it simply because you'd like to see more gifts under the tree, go for it!

    Answer by duckigrrl at 3:00 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • We do this too. I always plan on doing like 10 gifts between us and the guy in red, if you know what I mean, and then a stocking. Generally however, we end up with closer to ten a piece and the stocking, and stuff that was supposed to go in the stocking just sitting alongside it because it didn't fit. We just get excited. If you can afford it, and you are still teaching her the value behind the season, not the monetary value, but the moral value, then I say do whatever you feel like doing. And you are right, as she gets older she will start to understand the price per item may mean she gets less items, but they are "cooler" things. Like my son is starting to realize he can get 5 action figures for the same price as one video game. He is also 8.

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 3:02 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • I believe it would be wise to cut back a bit each year. You certainly could have a wonderful Christmas with less. It's not good for a child to be over-indulged and grow up thinking that's the way it should be and come to expect it. Even while buying her many nice things, you could shift the focus of the holiday to giving instead of getting.

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 3:23 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • I think the focus is in the wrong place. And I don't think you're doing her any favors by giving her so much. It would be terribly hard for her if later in life she always feels like she fails to measure up to all these things you're giving and doing. If you are going to continue going overboard like this, I hope you're trying to balance it by teaching her to help sort her outgrown clothes and toys to donate to charity and that sort of thing. But even with that, you're doing what you said you're doing - you're creating an expectation. Are you assuming that those expectations will be met all her life? She'll expect she's entitled to so very much - and life just doesn't work that way.

    Answer by ihatetocook at 4:14 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

  • We have had only a few Christmases in this country. We came here from Haiti. We have so much now. Before we often struggled for food. Now we have a warm apartment and there is much food at the market to bring home. I watch many schoolchildren who have so much. It amazes me. At my children's school, I see children who do not care for their belongings. They do not treat things with care. They do not care about their things because they have so many. I am glad that my girls appreciate what they have. They know what is like to not have. I do not have much money and I work two full time jobs to care for my family. It is well worth it. I do not believe that Christmas must be huge. Christmas is about love and giving and family.

    Answer by errantmommy at 5:06 PM on Sep. 29, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.