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Am I over-reacting?

My DH has this friend who is a loser, and got this girl pregnant and is "being there for her" only not really. He is letting her stay with his grandparents while he is out of town. He sleeps with other girls, treats his girl like crap when he is around her. She marches to the beat of her own drum, and is a little weird. For some reason, she has started turning to DH for advice about how to do things. I haven't really minded it too much until now. I tend to get jealous when I'm preggo and I don't know if it is just that or if something is up. She is on the phone with him right now! Is it really neccessary to call and bitch about her kid's dad at 1 in the morning?? I know I shouldn't worry about him since he is up front about it and will talk to her in front of me, but is she up to something? Should I ask her to stop calling/texting him?

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LolosMom

Asked by LolosMom at 1:54 AM on Oct. 23, 2008 in Relationships

Level 3 (24 Credits)
Answers (20)
  • ohhhh...wow! Bounderies need to be set and DH should probably attempt to set them first. Thank goodness he is upfront about this situation because it could turn into a bad situation for everyone involved. Maybe he should talk to his friend (the loser guy) first but I think he probably should confront her first. Good luck, dear!
    rcbrown

    Answer by rcbrown at 2:00 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • My dad had a woman who would give him her pitty stories all the time....They ended up having an emotional affair. He started out feeling sorry for her by how she told him her husband treated her. Then she started telling him how her husband has never made her have an Orgasm...The she started flirting and my dad was wrapped around her finger. He found out later that she was just doing that so he would do her job for her while she screwed the boss (They worked together) He fell for all of it until he found out all of this crap wasn't true and she was only enticing him so he would do what she wanted. Women who like to seek pity from other men are bad newa.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:00 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • i'd guess that she's not meaning to be intrusive, she's just not used to a guy who will listen and talk to her. i doubt she's up to something, maybe she just really needs a friend right now, since obviously her guy lacks all the good qualities. i'd give it a little while, maybe put a few restrictions, like no calling/texting after 10pm or something, but don't cut her off completely. as long as your hubby is aware that its just a platonic friendship, it shouldn't really be a concern. it would just bug me to have people calling at 1am, no matter who they were
    llansky

    Answer by llansky at 2:02 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • Wow. I would get jealous too... I would definitely talk to my husband and tell him I feel like she's leaning on *my* husband too much to make up for her boyfriend being a flake. I would want some ground rules, no late night calls! She needs to respect your relationship and some boundaries. It's a shame she has made some bad choices in men, but thats not your husbands place to stand in where his friend should be.
    Serafyna

    Answer by Serafyna at 2:09 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • It is NOT appropriate for her to confide in your DH about this. Especially not the late night phone calls! You are not over-reacting in the least. There are boundaries in relationships. She has crossed way over the line. Remind your husband that this girl does not have the best judgment. He needs to be the sensible one and check her quick.
    hopelessnance

    Answer by hopelessnance at 2:15 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • Would you call your husband's friend at 1 am to talk? Would you call your husband's friend for advice? Probably not!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:18 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • Sarafyna said it perfectly
    TiffanyLove18

    Answer by TiffanyLove18 at 2:25 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • Maybe you should try to help her, or talk to her instead of getting so offended. She sounds like she needs a friend now, more than ever.
    OOHPFG

    Answer by OOHPFG at 2:35 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • ditto OOHPFG
    pnwmom

    Answer by pnwmom at 2:41 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • damn u wrote alot! sorry i couldnt answer it seemed to long and boring to read:(
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:48 AM on Oct. 23, 2008

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