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How do you get kids to stop fighting?

I have a 6yr old girl and a 4 yr old boy. They fight non stop and it is getting worse. We thought that my 4yr old gave her a black eye last night after punching her in the face. We were told to let them fight it out and let me tell you bad idea it got worse. I don't know how much is normal or when enough is enough. They are really hurting each other and have started to break things. They don't see that kind of stuff at home. They don't get spanked often. So now the rule is if you hit each other I'm going to hit you. Yes this is probably not the best idea but we have tried everything. I'm hopping that it will scare them and they will stop. They each got a spanking last night after their fight and first thing this morning my 4yr old got another for smacking her in the face in the car. I guess she leaned to close to him and he didn't want her to so he smacked her. I'm so lost and what to do about it. Please help.

Answer Question
 
momoftwo0406

Asked by momoftwo0406 at 1:15 PM on Oct. 1, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 4 (28 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • My mom would always make us sit and stare at eachother for 5 or 10 mins....we would end up laughing and just go on....now I have yet to try this, bc mine fight so much and it pisses me off! I usually send them in the backyard to play so they stop bugging me....maybe I should try the staring thing...
    LuvMyMedic3ID

    Answer by LuvMyMedic3ID at 1:22 PM on Oct. 1, 2010

  • I never thought about that. I may have to try it they drive me nuts and I just want it to stop. Thank you
    momoftwo0406

    Comment by momoftwo0406 (original poster) at 1:27 PM on Oct. 1, 2010

  • Sounds like my 10 year old daughter and 6 year old son. They fight like that. I don't know how to stop it. I have tried making them hold hands after fighting. I've tried grounding them and etc.. It is pissing me off. My main concern is my daughter hurting my son. She is about 65lbs and my son is so tiny and he isn't even close to weighing 40lbs. I just send them outside now. They will usually carry on out there too.banging head into wall

    PoisonousBlonde

    Answer by PoisonousBlonde at 1:30 PM on Oct. 1, 2010

  • I would not let them fight it out. I have seen what that happens with some families. I think they are too old for spanking, so what you need to do is what they will hate and that is talking it out. Sit them down at the dinner table tell they clam down and then they have to tell each other why they did it what they could they do to make things better. Must say they are sorry.
    Get them to talk, they are not to young for that.

    This will only work if you do it all the time they fight. Good Luck
    gammie

    Answer by gammie at 1:32 PM on Oct. 1, 2010

  • My older 2 are like that- they just can't seem to get along (and don't want to either). What I do is I let them fuss for a few minutes and if they don't get it resolved or if they start in with physical contact (hitting, shoving...) then I step in- I listen to each one's version of it, I talk to each one about their part in the incident and then I separate them. Then consequences depending on what happened and who did what.
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 3:07 PM on Oct. 1, 2010

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