Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

7 Bumps

Would you seriously NOT have a problem with you fiance CHEATING on you BEFORE you were married????

This stems from another question.

I can't even imagine how anyone can trust a person that they are supposed to marry if they've cheated before the marriage even begins. When you ask someone to marry you than you are making a commitment to that person for the rest of your life.

Maybe it's because my husband and I were both virgins on our wedding night but I can't believe some women don't have a problem with a man having "one last fling" before their marriage.

That would be a deal breaker for me. How about you?

Answer Question

Asked by miasmommy21407 at 6:34 PM on Oct. 2, 2010 in Relationships

Level 21 (10,270 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • Well, I'd sure kick some ass.

    I'd leave him at the alter-Then conduct something to tell everybody what he did and why i'm not there :) (while he's waiting)

    Answer by Chell.o_0 at 6:37 PM on Oct. 2, 2010

  • I'm with you. When you are in a committed relationship, cheating is cheating. BF/GF, engaged, married: you don't cheat. I'd have the same reaction to it as I would if we were married when the cheating happened.

    Answer by Raine2001 at 6:38 PM on Oct. 2, 2010

  • Oh, i would have a HUGE problem with that! I don't believe it's OK for a man to cheat, even if they're not married. If someone is in a committed relationship, but not married...that is still a firm commitment regardless how the government views your relationship.

    Yes, it would be a deal breaker for me also.


    Answer by samurai_chica at 6:38 PM on Oct. 2, 2010

  • I would have a SERIOUS problem with it. If it is your FIANCE, then he has already made a commitment. For me, the wedding and the relationship would be off. Anyone capable of that kind of betrayal has no business proposng marriage in the first place. And once a cheat, pretty much always a cheat. No thanks.

    Answer by CarriePM at 6:39 PM on Oct. 2, 2010

  • I'm with you, too. If my husband had cheated on me at any point (or, frankly, on anyone), no way would we have gotten married. I was engaged to a guy years ago who had cheated on me, and I could never truly forgive him. We broke up because of it months after it happened.

    Answer by musicpisces at 6:40 PM on Oct. 2, 2010

  • I know what post you're talking about.. I would definitely have a problem, especially if he wasn't the one who came clean about it. Finding out from someone else would piss me off even more! The trust would no longer be there and I would be so disgusted that he slept with someone else and had a kid, which most likely means it was unprotected. Then he comes and has unprotected sex with me! It would definitely be a deal breaker for me. My husband and I weren't virgins when we married. I lost my virginity to him and he lost his virginity to his ex-girlfriend before me (which I absolutely hate, but have learned to live with it). I do believe that once you are with someone, you should be committed to them and only them. If you feel the need to stray, you should let the partner know and then make arrangements to where you can be with someone else so it isn't cheating. Like divorce, seperation or breaking up!

    Answer by poptart0325 at 6:53 PM on Oct. 2, 2010

  • It would be a deal breaker for me,too. I was a virgin for my husband and if he had cheated, I don't think I would have been able to get past it. I figure if one person is not enough for antone and they need to sleep with others, they are not meant to get married.

    Answer by gertie41 at 6:55 PM on Oct. 2, 2010

  • Cheating is cheating no matter when it's done before or after I would kick him to the curb if I ever found out that he cheated ever

    Answer by Moms_Angels1960 at 6:57 PM on Oct. 2, 2010

  • I would have a huge problem with it. It would be bye bye wedding.

    Answer by MaryWolfe at 6:58 PM on Oct. 2, 2010

  • I told hubs early on in our dating relationship that cheating is something I would not tolerate, and if he ever cheated I'd kick him to the curb so fast his head would spin. Since his last gh had cheated on him-- he completely understood what I was talking about and agreed with me.

    Answer by MizLee at 7:12 PM on Oct. 2, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.