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Do you agree with the way I punished my daughter?

My daughter went truant. At the time she was into a goth phase so her punishment was to wear pink to school for a week. Then she did it again! I was furious! So for her punishment I got a big black trash bag, filled it with all her cool cloths (leaving only the stuff grandma had bought her) took her to the Goodwill and made her donate the lot. Hit 'em where it hurts that what I say.


Asked by onethentwins at 10:59 PM on Oct. 23, 2008 in Teens (13-17)

Level 22 (12,497 Credits)
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Answers (50)
  • As I said...when I was a teen I didn't let my clothing make my identity. And yes as a teen she may hate her mother for it but what can she do that WON'T make her teen say "I HATE YOU"? Grounding can cause resentment and so can no TV. Teens are emotional like that.

    As for the punishment not fitting...what does taking away her TV have to do with skipping school? What does grounding have to do with skipping school?

    You're probably going to say that by doing those things you are taking away privileges ...and I agree...but fashionable clothing is a privilege as well. She never said that she was taking away ALL of her clothes...and what happens when standard punishment doesn't work? I agree that those are great forms of punishment but sometimes it takes more than that.


    Answer by AvasMommy810 at 1:05 AM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • Hmm...I suppose that might be an effective punishment. It's not like you physically hurt her or anything.

    Answer by caitxrawks at 11:01 PM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • great great great, but did you look at my punishment play book, lol. Yeah you have to hit them where it hurts to get their attention.

    Answer by Jenlos at 11:01 PM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • I remember when I was young. I had a fav pair of jeans that had holes and paint all over them. when I messed up one time my mom trew them in the dumpster. That sucked. I am now a mom of 4, I think I would go about it in a different way. But to each their own..I hope she'll straighten up 4 u.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:02 PM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • Honestly, when I was a teenager, this would have pissed me off more, and made me hate and resent you rather than change my behavior. Embarassing her by walking her into the school building yourself might work

    Answer by gypsysmiles at 11:04 PM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • I remember when i was in Jr high i went through all the stages including goth, i didn't go all out like some do but i did wear a lot of black, it is only a faze and she's trying to express herself in some way, a lot of teens go through these fazes to find who they are, you should let her do it but tone it down some if it's to extreme.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:08 PM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • I like it!!!

    Answer by pupmom at 11:13 PM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • your daughter did what??

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:14 PM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • Oh I would've HATED that as a kid!! I think you did and excellent job! When it comes to punishment, I always say get creative but keep it safe...I think that was a VERY creative thing to do! It definitely would've worked for ME as a kid! I was into the whole silly "goth" thing too (a stage that your daughter will grow out of definitely and thankfully BTW)  and I can honestly say what you did would DEFINITELY get the point across to me!

    Discipline is all about trial and error...finding out what works best for you and your family through failed past expierences and knowledge gained. Explore your options and keep up the great work! (she'll hate you now but thank you doubt).


    Answer by AvasMommy810 at 11:15 PM on Oct. 23, 2008

  • I probably would have just put the clothes away for a month or so instead of giving them away, but then again, I'm not to the teenage stage yet so what do I know - LOL!

    Hubby was sitting here when I read this and he said to tell you "WAY TO GO!"

    (Course he's a middle school teacher who deals with teenagers every day - ha!)

    Answer by blessed3times at 11:16 PM on Oct. 23, 2008