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my mil has not talked to my dh or seen my ds for 6 months bc we dont get along

i think my dh should call her and ask her if she is ok to not talk to him if something ever happened ( god forbid) to my dh.. bc life is short and tommorow is not a promise.. my 44 yr old sister passed away in may.. so i know this first hand.
do u think thats tell my mil what to do?.. or being controlling..? or being judgemental. ?my dh says if she doesnt want to talk to us or be a part of our sons life thats her choice.
i agree
but my strong personality feels the need for him to point out that she takes him being for granted!

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Asked by Rydersmommy616 at 2:01 AM on Oct. 3, 2010 in Relationships

Level 14 (1,405 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • All I can say is that my mother in law wanted nothing to do with me because I had been divorced, and she is Catholic. I tried for a few years, even behind my husband's back. He finally said....that's it, she doesn't want a relationship, it's her choice. We've been married 22 years, I've asked many times if he won't feel bad when she dies...she's in her 80's, but he says she chose this. Our sons are her only grandchildren, and she doesn't even know them. They are 18 & 21, she saw them at a funeral a couple of years ago, and showed no interest in them. I know it hurt my husband, but the boys don't know her so they didn't even care.

    I think the whole thing is very sad, if there's any way to fix it, I'd try, my mil missed her grandson's entire childhoods.....what a waste.
    Best wishes to you.

    Answer by ohwrite at 2:09 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • I would leave it up to your husband. Maybe there are deeper issues with her and he truly doesn't care if she is in your family's life.

    Answer by sherribeare at 2:12 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • I would just stay out of it. It is his mother, they need to figure it out.

    Answer by AdrianaS at 2:35 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • Let it be. I wish alot of other mean would learn to stand up there mothers at times and if he is ok with it well you should be also

    Answer by moma22angels at 3:33 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • seriously its her loss and not your problem. My MIL does the same thing and we just stopped worrying about it. In my MIL's case she's just upset because she isn't #1 in her son's life anymore and can't control and manipulate him anymore, hence why she hates me. Tough.. grow up, lady (the MIL).

    Our boys will almost be grown by the time she gets over it enough to wanna be close and by then, they won't care. Her loss.

    Answer by Zoeyis at 7:22 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • It's her loss. Let her deal with it when she realizes what she's done wrong.

    Answer by _Tam_ at 3:11 PM on Oct. 3, 2010

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