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How can we deal with this bully....?

My 8 year old son is being bullied by an 8 year old girl at school and on the bus. This girl trips him, hits him, teases him and pulls his hair (she does this to numerous other children as well.) I've talked to her parents and they say "Your son should toughen up." I've talked to the school principal but this girl doesn't lash out at any of the children when teachers are around or she says it was an accident so they can't really do anything. My son has asked her to please stop and has tried ignoring her (thats when she started hitting him). I am at a loss here. What else can I do?


Asked by Jocelyn_411 at 10:35 AM on Oct. 3, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 5 (91 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • My son was once being picked on by this little boy in class when he was in Kindergarten. He told the teacher, and this little boy just kept on. So I told my son to handle it himself if the teacher didn't, and so he did. It took a couple of times but the other little boy finally got the hint that my son wasn't going to take his crap and left him alone the rest of the year. Sometimes they just have to defend themselves.

    And we have taught both of our children, a girl and a boy, that they are to NEVER throw the first punch, but if someone hits them and starts a fight, they better finish it and as long as they don't throw the first they are NOT going to get in trouble at home. They may get suspended from school for a day or two (but if they are I am going to talk to the principal) but there will be no discipline coming at them from home for defending themselves. I was raised that way and they will be, too.

    Answer by QueenMomma2023 at 11:54 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • you need to get ahold of the BOARD OF EDUCATION in your county if the school does NOTHING then they will make the school do something...stress out the point that bulling does not stop with yelling pulling hair and back talking it gets and had gotten in many many cases deadly...MAKE YOUR VOICE BE the local news report it take her parent to court and put a restraining order on her parent for the child...and then the school can pull her and put her in a alternative school... I WILL BE DAMNED THE DAY MY KIDS GET TOUCHED AND HURT BY OTHERS AND NOT FIND A WAY...go for it mama stop the bulling

    Answer by iNk-FrEaK at 10:40 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • You go to the principal and demand that they do something and let them know what the parents of this child said.

    Answer by staceynoel at 10:41 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • Whil this is not the right way to handle this when my grandson was being bullied at school my daughter talked to the principal of cours kids that are the bulliers are too smart to let someone else see them do anyting my daughter told my grandson to just fight back and once they knew my grandson was going to fight back they stopped they only do it to kids that they know aren't going to do anything back once they find out that they are fighting back they go to someone else. While my grandson wasn't smart enough not to let the teachers see this he got suspended but my daughter told the principal it wouldn't of come to this had they just taken care of it it never happened again. You go momma for trying to stop the bullies they aren't happy just like the mommas on here that bash those would be the kind of parents bullies have

    Answer by Moms_Angels1960 at 10:51 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • Because it's a girl.....i dont know. I refuse to let my kids be bullied. And i refuse to coddle and over-protect them to the point that they dont know how to defend themselves when needed because i always ran to the principal anytime anyone was mean to them. REAL life isn't like that. Now, i dont condone fighting AT ALL. But if someone hits my kid, he will NOT be in trouble with us at home if he hits back AS LONG as he didn't start it.

    Maybe it's just the country life i'm from, but kids learn to take care of their own problems around here. In fact, there was a teenage neighborhood kid that was constantly making nasty perverted comments to little girls on the bus, and my neighbors son finally threatened to knock his block off if he heard it again. The little pervert never did it again.

    I think bullies mess with the kids they know will take it. MY kids will never be the ones just taking it. But they wont be the bullies eithe

    Answer by MommaTurbo at 11:09 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • It is the duty of the school/prinicpal to adhere to the new Anti- Bullying Laws! If not -they can be held legally liable if anything, God forbid, serious happened to your son. The parents of this child must be backwards, inbreds! That kind of thinking is archaic! They can also be held legally liable for any medical bills due to injury caused to your son, by their bully daughter! Hope they have their homeowner's insurance up to date! Talk to the principal again. Let him/her know that if things are not handled to your satisfaction, then you will be contacting the School Board, local TV stations/newspaper & an attorney- not necessarily in that order! I'm betting you'll get results. Good luck.

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 11:11 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • Confront the parents again and ask them again to do something if nothing comes of it ask the other parents to get together and demand a meeting with school board take your concerns about the girl as well if they say your son needs to toughen up what are they doing to her to get her tough is she being bullied at home and this is why she does it to others?

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 10:45 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • any way you can get this on video? can you son take a camera, or does he have friends that would be around where they could video tape it?
    when it comes to any issues I've had when I was just told 'I wasn't there, can't do anything' this has without a doubt been the most effective.
    the fact that a child is being bullied may not be enough for them to want to take any kind of action but I bet the threat of having the video put on you tube would.

    sad but true.

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 10:48 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • Talk to your child first, let him tell you how he feels. Advice him to ignore the girl, everytime she does something to him is to catch his attention. When she pulls his hair, have him just look at her (with confidence, not fear), ignore and walk away. Sometimes, I would say, the majority of time, bullies are neglected kids and need attention. Therefore, if they are ignored, then they will have not succeded.

    Talking to the partents may not help because they are defending their own child.

    The good thing son will grow and grow out of it.

    Hope this helps.


    Answer by Ahealthyskin at 10:50 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • about 10 years ago, I had the same problem with my one son. The principal did nothing. I finally told her that since she would not do anything, I would have my son nail the bully back. She said, "then your son will get detention too" I said "Too? The bully has NEVER gotten it for hitting my son, so if you give my son detention, you better be damned sure you give that brat detention" The bully hit my son, my son hit back. They both got detention and the bully never picked on my son again.

    Sad, isn't it? That I couldn't count on the school to protect him and I had to teach him to resort to violence to get things done.

    Answer by layh41407 at 10:55 AM on Oct. 3, 2010