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How do I boost a toddlers self esteem?

I just got out of an abusive relationship and my son's self esteem is BAD. His dad did a number on him and now I am having a hard time trying to boost it back up. Any tips?

**Oh yea, he is almost 2 and a half. He was born at the end of May and he is SUPER smart. He just has self esteem issues.

Answer Question

Asked by Amanda_Jo1209 at 11:45 AM on Oct. 3, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 9 (288 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • Lots and lots of praise!

    Answer by older at 11:48 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • Lots of encouragement.

    Answer by GinNTonic at 11:48 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • For every negative word a child hears, they need 10 good praise words to make it up! SOOOO make him a rewards chart! Give him small chores to do, things to help you out...give him praise and stickers to put on his chart! He will love it and can SEE how good he has been doing!

    You cant tell him enough how great the things he does your head off! lol

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 11:51 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • Praise him on every accomplishment, big or small. Find tons of things for him to do that he is good at and soon enough he will be beaming with pride:) He is young enough that any damage his father has done can be erased by a loving mother such as yourself. Good luck:)

    Answer by shanlaree at 11:52 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • Like the others said, tons of praise and rewards. Sticker chart for little chores or even just for behaving. Make a big deal of things he likes and add in as much cuddle time as you can. The physical contact with you will do wonders.

    Answer by flitpixie at 11:56 AM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • If you think back to when you were two and a half I'm sure that you probably don't remember much of those younger years.If you do, I think that's pretty amazing. I think that time will erase anything that was bad since he is still little. How you live now, in the present should help to fix anything about what has already transpired.

    Answer by CafeMochaMom1 at 12:05 PM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • Every night before my son goes to bed (3.5 birthday in May, too), I tell him how proud of him we are, tell him he's a great son, friend, grandson, cousin & student. I mention something he did that I thought was really cool. I ask him if he is a happy kid. If he says no, I ask him to talk about it.

    My husband and I talk about him in front of him as if he's not in the room and talk about how wonderful he is. We race each other up to bed and he wins 75% of the time and we celebrate the win. Most important I think is when (even if busy)we talks we stop to listen - it tells him he's important and what he has to say has value

    Answer by Jakesmommie at 12:08 PM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • NOTHING negative. Of course still discipline but mostly praise! That is so sad and soo happy you got out of it! Good for you Momma! Do your best that is all anyone can ask. Make sure he knows he is awesome, cute etc etc. Multiple times I day i ask my DD who;s awesome or who;s cute etc etc because I want her to know she is! Good luck!!!!

    Answer by delilahsmom1177 at 12:08 PM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • OMG, seriously. Self esteem cannot be given!! It is EARNED by oneself for a feeling of accomplishment. Give your child age appropriate tasks, encourage them to complete them fully to the best of their ability, and BOOM, there it is! Self-esteem: the gratification one feels for knowing they have accomplished something. Praise when you are impressed with their accomplishments...

    Answer by fohtrae at 12:58 PM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • I would definitely get some counseling :-) for you and for your little guy. Definitely encourage and praise whenEVER he does something good - and let him know how proud you are of him. It will be contageous :-) and hopefully he will learn soon to be proud of himself!

    Answer by mevxoxo at 1:34 PM on Oct. 3, 2010

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