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why do guys think they can rape and get away with it and you fell like it your fault?

Well I was rape 2 time one was 20 year ago and the other was 8 months ago and I didnt tell and know I fell like I should have. But I know I can but keep hearing him in my head just need someone to talk to?

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bubblesgirls

Asked by bubblesgirls at 6:35 AM on Oct. 24, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (7)
  • I was raped from the age of 6-9, and again as an adult. I went to a rape/incest group and thank God, have successfully diminished the nightmares, daymares, flashbacks, panic attacks, flight/or fight urges. I had to learn that I'm worthy of love, and to recognize the mixed messages I verbalize, or body language that could be misinterpreted by men. So when I say "no," it means "no" and I stand on it whether I'm drunk, high or whatever.
    Ewadun

    Answer by Ewadun at 7:21 AM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • I was raped over a year ago in my own home while my husband was serving in Iraq. I still am not over it but getting better. I have a good therapist who helped me so much. The police blamed me, everyone blamed me but my therapist told me that was bullshit and that no one had a right to do that to a woman. All because it was a hot night, 103 degrees outside and I had left the windows and doors open. Probably stupid of me but I lived in what I felt was a secure area. Please find a good therapist to talk too. If you don't like one, find another. They really can help. If I hadn't gone to one I don't know if I would still be here. But I will tell you NO ONE will EVER do that to me again.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:38 AM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • I was raped nearly 4 years ago. I have come to terms with it but only because I kinda had to. I see the asshole from time to time since he lives locally and was never prosecuted. I ended up telling him off. Anyways, it isn't your fault. It will never be your fault. There is actually a few lovely rape support groups on here. Maybe join one of them. If you ever need to talk I am here.
    purpleducky

    Answer by purpleducky at 9:50 AM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • I was raped over 30 yrs ago. I did tell someone (the college where it happened) and they swept it under the rug (he was a jock) and told me to go home and get married and have babies. My IQ makes his look so small his looks like a shoe size but they chose to keep him and send me home like it was nothing. To find my own peace I had to forgive him and that only happened about 3 yrs ago. I held in anger and hate which affected my life but his life was good. I needed to release myself from that anger and hate so chose to let it go. About 3 yrs ago a long time friend forced himself on me after I repeatedly told him "no" . I was furious but instead of filing charges and fight the system I decided to write his wife and tell her what happened. I felt that was more effective than putting him in jail. Yes, they do tend to make us feel like it was our fault
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:12 AM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • I believe you are right, you should have said something so this person does not move on and prey on another. These guys have to know the word NO means NO and not MAYBE> I don't care if you stand in front of a guy stark butt naked, NO MEANS NO> Not all men rape, maybe just the ones who for whatever reason dont have any respect for women at all. This surely is not excuse!!
    nana2u10

    Answer by nana2u10 at 10:56 AM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • They think they can get away with it because they do get away with it. It's so much easier to make a liar out of the victim than it is to prove that there was not consent. And we as women are so afraid to be judged, like it was our fault somehow, so we keep our mouths shut. But I believe in Karma. They'll get theirs in the end. All I can do is move on with my life because I love myself enough to not let it control me anymore. But I'll never forgive.
    Su-Z-Q

    Answer by Su-Z-Q at 11:51 AM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • I was raped by my dad for 5 yrs. He said he "needed it and would die if he didn't".
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:56 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

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