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Does your sibling acknowledge your SO's birthday? (aka Should I be upset?)

Here's my dilemma...

When DH and I got married, my sister was only 12 years old. Despite that fact, however, she always gave my DH a birthday present or at least made him a card. Something.

Last year, my sister (who was then 17) worked for my DH - he gave her a job after she spent months on a fruitless job search, and he let her live with us for the summer. So imagine my surprise when, after he gave her a job and let her live with us, she didn't give him a birthday present. Not so much as a card! To put things in perspective, my birthday is only 2 weeks before DH's and my sister bought me an expensive concert ticket for my bday last year.

Needless to say, DH was really hurt. He mentioned how much it upset him, and today is his birthday - 1 year later. Again, no word from my sister. (She took me shopping for my bday 2 weeks ago.)

Do I/we have a right to feel upset? Should I say anything? What would you do?


Asked by aliceryannesmom at 6:37 PM on Oct. 3, 2010 in Relationships

Level 20 (8,465 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • I'd talk with her in private and see what's going on?? Of course it's not the gift it's the thought that counts, but doesn't seem like she even gave it a thought =(

    Answer by skittles1108 at 6:40 PM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • I think sometimes people just don't even think about it. She's been thinking about your birthday all her life even if it's only 12 years longer than his, and maybe she doesn't know what to get him. Not a single one of my In-Laws even acknowledges my birthday (not so much as a card) which offended me at first since in reality I'm the one who makes sure they get a card, I'm the one who makes sure they get gifts, I'm the one who picks out there gifts etc. but I've decided it's not that they do it to hurt me, they just don't even realize. So I decided I have bigger fish to fry.

    Answer by MamaSarah1104 at 6:51 PM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • I would talk to her and see what's going on but no my siblings don't acknowledge my dh's birthday nor do i acknowledge theirs anymore

    Answer by Moms_Angels1960 at 6:52 PM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • Thanks ladies! I think it's only bugging me (and him) because she used to ALWAYS acknowledge his birthday, and even if she wasn't sure what to get him, she'd get him a nice card or something. Then it suddenly stopped. I feel really awful about it, mostly because my in-laws are SO sweet and attentive about my birthday. At least my mom makes up for it I guess. :-/

    Comment by aliceryannesmom (original poster) at 6:56 PM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • I don't really think it's that big of a deal, my sister is 18 and I don't even remeber if she got my dh a gift for his birthday or not, and if she doesn't get him one this year it wouldn't bother me in the least

    Answer by Liz132 at 7:07 PM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • My siblings and parents do not aknowledge my dh's birthday. They can't even remember how my son is or how long my dh and I have been married.

    Answer by Mom2Just1 at 7:58 PM on Oct. 3, 2010