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Did anybody else PLAN their second child and then experience some depression surrounding their pregnancy?

I know I am going to sound like a horrible person. My first son was a surprise. We were stoked. I did EVERYTHING I could to be the example of healthy and had the most positive experience ever. Even the little bit of anxiety I had before seemed to dissapear while I was pregnant.
I LOVE being a Mom. I feel it is my calling. We want more children and after trying for a couple months, we are pregnant. This is totally different. I feel so down lately and after looking inside myself, I think these might be the reasons why.
1. I knew for sure I would be the best Mother ever until I had my son. Now I question myself at times. I wonder if I am doing right by him. Some days I KNOW I am just not living up to my own expectations.
2. He is just at an age where he is such a joy to be around. We are so close (he is 2) and now that he is past the infant stage, I have a life again! We go out to lunch, I can bring him anywhere...CONTD

Answer Question

Asked by jenellemarie at 11:25 PM on Oct. 3, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 17 (3,583 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • The thought of starting all over again is overwhelming to me. I wanted like 4 kids, but after becoming pregnant, I think I just want these two.
    3. I worry even more about whether or not we will ever get ahead. I know it takes time, but we are finally moving forward after the first baby! Now my Husband works out of State 2 weeks on/2 weeks off. I have the help of family but even being pregnant while chasing a toddler alone for the day is much more than I expected.
    I KNOW I will love this baby with all I have, just as I love my son. I KNOW that I am a good Mother and now I am sad because I feel guilty for thinking these things. Am I alone here?
    4. I have had some complications already. Spotting, low fetal heart beat at 6 weeks (I think it was just done too early) and now some fluid (most likely blood) near the baby. Do you think I am just protecting myself from potential heartbreak? I am 8 weeks.

    Comment by jenellemarie (original poster) at 11:31 PM on Oct. 3, 2010

  • Sounds like you could use some support~
    Do you have a mom's group, a playdate mama-friend, a midwife, a doula, anyone that can lend an ear AND a hand?

    I did plan my second baby... and then I did find myself upset about it, regretting it... being pregnant and questioning everything. :-(
    I didn't tell anyone until about halfway through, some friends about 17 weeks. I was totally showing and it was obvious, but I hid it as much as possible.
    It was hard. I think I pretty much felt JUST like you~


    Answer by doulala at 1:43 AM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • And now I am 5 YEARS "postpartum" (lol), and life is soooooooo much different.
    I can look back at that time and remember... But I DID get through it, It was tough sometimes, for sure! But wow, I am here today and these 2 children are wonderful!!

    I hope you can get some support---


    Answer by doulala at 1:44 AM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • I am with you on this. My DS is 17 months and I am 18 weeks pregnant. We didnt plan either of them but were so happy both times we found out. But lately I have been feeling depressed and have no motivation to do anything. I LOVE my son he is my world we spend our days together playing and watchin elmo and thomas but lately I dont play as much. I feel like a horrible mother for the way I feel. Hang in there momma eventually it will get better, thats what they say. lol

    Answer by misssababe1128 at 8:55 AM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • Wew planned this pregnancy but I totaly understand what you mean. I am kinda depressed about it. I love how fun my son is right now and I just am scared I am not going to be able to love him as much as I love my son and I am mostly scared that this baby is going to take away from my time with my son.

    Answer by DeegansMomma08 at 12:39 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

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